english stories-london-第7部分

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rustle；　and　then　silence　again。　I　ran　out　with　the　calm　pride　of　a

successful　revenge　to　bring　in　the　body　of　my　victim；　and　I　found

underneath　a　laurel　no　predatory　tom…cat；　but　（as　the　discerning

reader　will　no　doubt　have　foreseen　long　since）　the　quivering　carcass

of　the　colonel's　black　poodle！



I　intend　to　set　down　here　the　exact　unvarnished　truth；　and　I　confess

that　at　first；　when　I　knew　what　I　had　done；　I　was　/not/　sorry。　I　was

quite　innocent　of　any　intention　of　doing　it；　but　I　felt　no　regret。　I

even　laughedmadman　that　I　wasat　the　thought　that　there　was　the　end

of　Bingo；　at　all　events；　that　impediment　was　removed；　my　weary　task　of

conciliation　was　over　for　ever！



But　soon　the　reaction　came；　I　realised　the　tremendous　nature　of　my

deed；　and　shuddered。　I　had　done　that　which　might　banish　me　from

Lilian's　side　for　ever！　All　unwittingly　I　had　slaughtered　a　kind　of

sacred　beast；　the　animal　around　which　the　Currie　household　had

wreathed　their　choicest　affections！　How　was　I　to　break　it　to　them？

Should　I　send　Bingo　in；　with　a　card　tied　to　his　neck　and　my　regrets

and　compliments？　That　was　too　much　like　a　present　of　game。　Ought　I　not

to　carry　him　in　myself？　I　would　wreathe　him　in　the　best　crape；　I　would

put　on　black　for　him；　the　Curries　would　hardly　consider　a　taper　and　a

white　sheet；　or　sack…cloth　and　ashes；　an　excessive　form　of　atonement；

but　I　could　not　grovel　to　quite　such　an　abject　extent。



I　wondered　what　the　colonel　would　say。　Simple　and　hearty；　as　a　general

rule；　he　had　a　hot　temper　on　occasions；　and　it　made　me　ill　as　I

thought；　would　he　and；　worse　still；　would　/Lilian/　believe　it　was

really　an　accident？　They　knew　what　an　interest　I　had　in　silencing　the

deceased　poodlewould　they　believe　the　simple　truth？



I　vowed　that　they　/should/　believe　me。　My　genuine　remorse　and　the

absence　of　all　concealment　on　my　part　would　speak　powerfully　for　me。　I

would　choose　a　favourable　time　for　my　confession；　that　very　evening　I

would　tell　all。



Still　I　shrank　from　the　duty　before　me；　and；　as　I　knelt　down

sorrowfully　by　the　dead　form　and　respectfully　composed　his　stiffening

limbs；　I　thought　that　it　was　unjust　of　fate　to　place　a　well…meaning

man；　whose　nerves　were　not　of　iron；　in　such　a　position。



Then；　to　my　horror；　I　heard　a　well…known　ringing　tramp　on　the　road

outside；　and　smelled　the　peculiar　fragrance　of　a　Burmese　cheroot。　It

was　the　colonel　himself；　who　had　been　taking　out　the　doomed　Bingo　for

his　usual　evening　run。



I　don't　know　how　it　was；　exactly；　but　a　sudden　panic　came　over　me。　I

held　my　breath；　and　tried　to　crouch　down　unseen　behind　the　laurels；

but　he　had　seen　me；　and　came　over　at　once　to　speak　to　me　across　the

hedge。



He　stood　there；　not　two　yards　from　his　favourite's　body！　Fortunately

it　was　unusually　dark　that　evening。



〃Ha；　there　you　are；　eh！〃　he　began；　heartily；　〃don't　rise；　my　boy；

don't　rise。〃



I　was　trying　to　put　myself　in　front　of　the　poodle；　and　did　not　rise

at　least；　only　my　hair　did。



〃You're　out　late；　ain't　you？〃　he　went　on；　〃laying　out　your　garden；

hey？〃



I　could　not　tell　him　that　I　was　laying　out　his　poodle！　My　voice　shook

as；　with　a　guilty　confusion　that　was　veiled　by　the　dusk；　I　said　it　was

a　fine　eveningwhich　it　was　not。



〃Cloudy；　sir；〃　said　the　colonel；　〃cloudy；　rain　before　morning；　I

think。　By　the　way；　have　you　seen　anything　of　Bingo　in　here？〃



This　was　the　turning…point。　What　I　/ought/　to　have　done　was　to　say

mournfully；　〃Yes；　I'm　sorry　to　say　I've　had　a　most　unfortunate

accident　with　him。　Here　he　is；　the　fact　is；　I'm　afraid　I've　/shot/

him！〃



But　I　couldn't。　I　could　have　told　him　at　my　own　time；　in　a　prepared

form　of　wordsbut　not　then。　I　felt　I　must　use　all　my　wits　to　gain

time；　and　fence　with　the　questions。



〃Why；〃　I　said；　with　a　leaden　airiness；　〃he　hasn't　given　you　the　slip；

has　he？〃



〃Never　did　such　a　thing　in　his　life！〃　said　the　colonel；　warmly；　〃he

rushed　off　after　a　rat　or　a　frog　or　something　a　few　minutes　ago；　and

as　I　stopped　to　light　another　cheroot　I　lost　sight　of　him。　I　thought　I

saw　him　slip　in　under　your　gate；　but　I've　been　calling　him　from　the

front　there　and　he　won't　come　out。〃



No；　and　he　never　/would/　come　out　any　more。　But　the　colonel　must　not

be　told　that　just　yet。　I　temporised　again：　〃If；〃　I　said；　unsteadily

〃if　he　had　slipped　in　under　the　gate　I　should　have　seen　him。　Perhaps

he　took　it　into　his　head　to　run　home？〃



〃Oh；　I　shall　find　him　on　the　door…step；　I　expect；　the　knowing　old

scamp！　Why；　what　d'　ye　think　was　the　last　thing　he　did；　now？〃



I　could　have　given　him　the　very　latest　intelligence；　but　I　dared　not。

However；　it　was　altogether　too　ghastly　to　kneel　there　and　laugh　at

anecdotes　of　Bingo　told　across　Bingo's　dead　body；　I　could　not　stand

that。　〃Listen；〃　I　said；　suddenly；　〃wasn't　that　his　bark？　There；　again；

it　seems　to　come　from　the　front　of　your　house；　don't　you　think？〃



〃Well；〃　said　the　colonel；　〃I'll　go　and　fasten　him　up　before　he's　off

again。　How　your　teeth　are　chattering！　You've　caught　a　chill；　man；　go

indoors　at　once；　and；　if　you　feel　equal　to　it；　look　in　half　an　hour

later；　about　grog…time；　and　I'll　tell　you　all　about　it。　Compliments　to

your　mother。　Don't　forgetabout　grog…time！〃



I　had　got　rid　of　him　at　last；　and　I　wiped　my　forehead；　gasping　with

relief。　I　would　go　round　in　half　an　hour；　and　then　I　should　be

prepared　to　make　my　melancholy　announcement。　For；　even　then；　I　never

thought　of　any　other　course；　until　suddenly　it　flashed　upon　me　with

terrible　clearness　that　my　miserable　shuffling　by　the　hedge　had　made

it　impossible　to　tell　the　truth！　I　had　not　told　a　direct　lie；　to　be

sure；　but　then　I　had　given　the　colonel　the　impression　that　I　had

denied　having　seen　the　dog。　Many　people　can　appease　their　consciences

by　reflecting　that；　whatever　may　be　the　effect　their　words　produce；

they　did　contrive　to　steer　clear　of　a　downright　lie。　I　never　quite

knew　where　the　distinction　lay　morally；　but　there　/is/　that　feelingI

have　it　myself。



Unfortunately；　prevarication　has　this　drawback：　that；　if　ever　the

truth　comes　to　light；　the　prevaricator　is　in　just　the　same　case　as　if

he　had　lied　to　the　most　shameless　extent；　and　for　a　man　to　point　out

that　the　words　he　used　contained　no　absolute　falsehood　will　seldom

restore　confidence。



I　might；　of　course；　still　tell　the　colonel　of　my　misfortune；　and　leave

him　to　infer　that　it　had　happened　after　our　interview；　but　the　poodle

was　fast　becoming　cold　and　stiff；　and　they　would　most　probably　suspect

the　real　time　of　the　occurrence。



And　then　Lilian　would　hear　that　I　had　told　a　string　of　falsehoods　to

her　uncle　over　the　dead　body　of　their　idolised　Bingoan　act；　no

doubt；　of　abominable　desecration；　of　unspeakable　profanity；　in　her

eyes。



If　it　would　have　been　difficult　before　to　prevail　on　her　to　accept　a

blood…stained　hand；　it　would　be　impossible　after　that。　No；　I　had

burned　my　ships；　I　was　cut　off　for　ever　from　the　straightforward

course；　that　one　moment　of　indecision　had　decided　my　conduct　in　spite

of　me；　I　must　go　on　with　it　now；　and　keep　up　the　deception　at　all

hazards。



It　was　bitter。　I　had　always　tried　to　preserve　as　many　of　the　moral

principles　which　had　been　instilled　into　me　as　can　be　conveniently

retained　in　this　grasping　world；　and　it　had　been　my　pride　that；

roughly　speaking；　I　had　never　been　guilty　of　an　unmistakable

falsehood。



But　henceforth；　if　I　meant　to　win　Lilian；　that　boast　must　be

relinquished　for　ever。　I　should　have　to　lie　now　with　all　my　might；

without　limit　or　scruple；　to　dissemble　incessantly；　and　〃wear　a　mask；〃

as　the　poet　Bunn　beautifully　expressed　it　long　ago；　〃over　my　hollow

heart。〃　I　felt　all　this　keenly；　I　did　not　think　it　was　right；　but　what

was　I　to　do？



After　thinking　all　this　out　very　carefully；　I　decided　that　my　only

course　was　to　bury　the　poor　animal　where　he　fell；　and　say　nothing

about　it。　With　some　vague　idea　of　precaution；　I　first　took　off　the

silver　collar　he　wore；　and　then　hastily　interred　him　with　a　garden…

trowel；　and　succeeded　in　removing　all　traces　of　the　disaster。



I　fancy　I　felt　a　certain　relief　in　the　knowledge　that　there　would　now

be　no　necessity　to　tell　my　pitiful　story　and　risk　the　loss　of　my

neighbours'　esteem。



By…and…by；　I　thought；　I　would　plant　a　rose…tree　over　his　remains；　and

some　day；　as　Lilian　and　I；　in　the　noontide　of　our　domestic　bliss；

stood　before　it　admiring　its　creamy　luxuriance；　I　might　（perhaps）　find

courage　to　confess　that　the　tree　owed　some　of　that　luxuriance　to　the

long…lost　Bingo。



There　was　a　touch　of　poetry　in　this　idea　that　lightened　my　gloom　for

the　moment。



I　need　scarcely　say　that　I　did　not　go　round　to　Shuturgarden　that

evening。　I　was　not　hardened　enough　for　that　yet；　my　manner　might

betray　me；　and　so　I　very　prudently　stayed　at　home。



But　that　night　my　sleep　was　broken　by　frightful　dreams。　I　was

perpetually　trying　to　bury　a　great；　gaunt　poodle；　which　would　persis