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the kentons-第38部分
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imagined being in love with her because it would be so frantic。 At the
same time he dramatized an event in which he died for her; and she became
aware of his hopeless passion at the last moment; while the anarchist
from whom he had saved her confessed that the bomb had been meant for
her。 Perhaps it was a pistol。
He escaped from the valet as soon as he could; and went back to
Scheveningen limp from this experience; but the queens were before him。
They had driven down to visit the studio of a famous Dutch painter there;
and again the doom was on Boyne to press forward with the other
spectators and wait for the queens to appear and get into their carriage。
The young Queen's looks were stamped in Boyne's consciousness; so that he
saw her wherever he turned; like the sun when one has gazed at it。 He
thought how that Trannel had said he ought to hand her into her carriage;
and he shrank away for fear he should try to do so; but he could not
leave the place till she had come out with the queenmother and driven
off。 Then he went slowly and breathlessly into the hotel; feeling the
Queen's miniature in his pocket。 It made his heart stand still; and then
bound forward。 He wondered again what he should do with it。 If he kept
it; Lottie would be sure to find it; and he could not bring himself to
the sacrilege of destroying it。 He thought he would walk out on the
breakwater as far as he could and throw it into the sea; but when he got
to the end of the mole he could not do so。 He decided that he would give
it to Ellen to keep for him; and not let Lottie see it; or perhaps he
might pretend he had bought it for her。 He could not do that; though;
for it would not be true; and if he did he could not ask her to keep it
from Lottie。
At dinner Mr。 Trannel told him he ought to have been there to see the
Queen; that she had asked especially for him; and wanted to know if they
had not sent up her card to him。 Boyne meditated an apt answer through
all the courses; but he had not thought of one when they had come to the
'corbeille de fruits'; and he was forced to go to bed without having
avenged himself。
In taking rooms for her family at the hotel; Lottie had arranged for her
emancipation from the thraldom of rooming with Ellen。 She said that had
gone on long enough; if she was grown up at all; she was grown up enough
to have a room of her own; and her mother had yielded to reasoning which
began and ended with this position。 She would have interfered so far as
to put Lottie into the room next her; but Lottie said that if Boyne was
the baby he ought to be next his mother; Ellen might come next him; but
she was going to have the room that was furthest from any implication of
the dependence in which she had languished; and her mother submitted
again。 Boyne was not sorry; there had always been hours of the night
when he felt the need of getting at his mother for reassurance as to
forebodings which his fancy conjured up to trouble him in the wakeful
dark。 It was understood that he might freely do this; and though the
judge inwardly fretted; he could not deny the boy the comfort of his
mother's encouraging love。 Boyne's visits woke him; but he slept the
better for indulging in the young nerves that tremor from impressions
against which the old nerves are proof。 But now; in the strange fatality
which seemed to involve him; Boyne could not go to his mother。 It was
too weirdly intimate; even for her; besides; when he had already tried to
seek her counsel she had ignorantly repelled him。
The night after his day in The Hague; when he could bear it no longer; he
put on his dressing…gown and softly opened Ellen's door; awake; Ellen?〃
he whispered。
〃Yes; What is it; Boyne〃 her gentle voice asked。
〃He came and sat down by her bed and stole his hand into hers; which she
put out to him。 The watery moonlight dripped into the room at the edges
of the shades; and the long wash of the sea made itself regularly heard
on the sands。
〃Can't you sleep?〃 Ellen asked again。 〃Are you homesick?〃
〃Not exactly that。 But it does seem rather strange for us to be off here
so far; doesn't it?〃
〃Yes; I don't see how I can forgive myself for making you come;〃 said
Ellen; but her voice did not sound as if she were very unhappy。
〃You couldn't help it;〃 said Boyne; and the words suggested a question to
him。 〃Do you believe that such things are ordered; Ellen?〃
〃Everything is ordered; isn't it?〃
〃I suppose so。 And if they are; we're not; to blame for what happens。〃
〃Not if we try to do right。〃
〃Of course。 The Kentons always do that;〃 said Boyne; with the faith in
his family that did not fail him in the darkest hour。 〃But what I mean
is that if anything comes on you that you can't foresee and you can't get
out of〃 The next step was not clear; and Boyne paused。 He asked;
〃Do you think that we can control our feelings; Ellen?〃
〃About what?〃
〃Well; about persons that we like。〃 He added; for safety; 〃Or dislike。〃
〃I'm afraid not;〃 said Ellen; sadly; 〃We ought to like persons and
dislike them for some good reason; but we don't。〃
〃Yes; that's what I mean;〃 said Borne; with a long breath。 〃Sometimes it
seems like a kind of possession; doesn't it?〃
〃It seems more like that when we like them;〃 Ellen said。
〃Yes; that's what I mean。 If a person was to take a fancy to some one
that was above him; that was richer; or older; he wouldn't be to blame
for it; would he?〃
〃Was that what you wanted to ask me about?〃
Borne hesitated。 〃Yes〃 he said。 He was in for it now。
Ellen had not noticed Boyne's absorption with Miss Rasmith on the ship;
but she vaguely remembered hearing Lottie tease him about her; and she
said now; 〃He wouldn't be to blame for it if he couldn't help it; but if
the person was much older it would be a pity!〃
〃Uh; she isn't so very much older;〃 said Borne; more cheerfully than he
had spoken before。
〃Is it somebody that you have taken a fancy to Borne?〃
〃I don't know; Ellen。 That's what makes it so kind of awful。 I can't
tell whether it's a real fancy; or I only think it is。 Sometimes I think
it is; and sometimes I think that I think so because I am afraid to
believe it。 Do you under Ellen?〃
〃It seems to me that I do。 But you oughtn't to let your fancy run away
with you; Boyne。 What a queer boy!〃
〃It's a kind of fascination; I suppose。 But whether it's a real fancy or
an unreal one; I can't get away from it。〃
〃Poor boy!〃 said his sister。
〃Perhaps it's those books。 Sometimes I think it is; and I laugh at the
whole idea; and then again it's so strong that I can't get away from it。
Ellen!〃
〃Well; Boyne?〃
I could tell you who it is; if you think that would do any goodif you
think it would help me to see it in the true light; or you could help me
more by knowing who it is than you can now。〃
〃I hope it isn't anybody that you can't respect; Boyne?〃
〃No; indeed! It's somebody you would never dream of。〃
〃Well?〃 Ellen was waiting for him to speak; but he could not get the
words out; even to her。
〃I guess I'll tell you some other time。 Maybe I can get over it myself。〃
〃It would be the best way if you could。〃
He rose and left her bedside; and then he came back。 〃 Ellen; I've got
something that I wish you would keep for me。〃
〃What is it? Of course I will。〃
〃Well; it'ssomething I don't want you to let Lottie know I've got。
She tells that Mr。 Trannel everything; and then he wants to make fun。
Do you think he's so very witty?〃
〃I can't help laughing at some things he says。〃
〃I suppose he is;〃 Boyne ruefully admitted。 〃But that doesn't make you
like him any better。 Well; if you won't tell Lottie; I'll give it to you
now。〃
〃I won't tell anything that you don't want me to; Boyne。〃
〃It's nothing。 It's just…a picture of the Queen on porcelain; that I got
in The Hague。 The guide took me into the store; and I thought I ought to
get something。〃
〃Oh; that's very nice; Boyne。 I do like the Queen so much。 She's so
sweet!〃
〃Yes; isn't she?〃 said Boyne; glad of Ellen's approval。 So far; at
least; he was not wrong。 〃Here it is now。〃
He put the miniature in Ellen's hand。 She lifted herself on her elbow。
〃Light the candle and let me see it。〃
〃No; no!〃 he entreated。 〃It might wake Lottie; andand Good…night;
Ellen。〃
〃Can you go to sleep now; Boyne?〃
〃Oh yes。 I'm all right。 Good…night。〃
〃Good…night; then。〃
Borne stooped over and kissed her; and went to the door。 He came back
and asked; 〃You don't think it was silly; or anything; for me to get it?〃
〃No; indeed! It's just what you will like to have when you get home。
We've all seen her so often。 I'll put it in my trunk; and nobody shall
know about it till we're safely back in Tuskingum。〃
Boyne sighed deeply。 〃Yes; that's what I meant。 Good…night。〃
〃Good…night; Boyne。〃
〃I hope I haven't waked you up too much?〃
〃Oh no。 I can get to sleep easily again。〃
〃Well; good…night。〃 Boyne sighed again; but not so deeply; and this time
he went out。
XXII。
Mrs。 Kenton woke with the clear vision which is sometimes vouchsafed to
people whose eyes are holden at othe
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