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st. ives-第27部分
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superior; he is no longer young' … at which word you are to
conceive the Major's face。 'It is admitted he has broken his
parole。 I know not his reason; and no more do you。 It might be
patriotism in this hour of our country's adversity; it might be
humanity; necessity; you know not what in the least; and you permit
yourself to reflect on his honour。 To break parole may be a
subject for pity and not derision。 I have broken mine … I; a
colonel of the Empire。 And why? I have been years negotiating my
exchange; and it cannot be managed; those who have influence at the
Ministry of War continually rush in before me; and I have to wait;
and my daughter at home is in a decline。 I am going to see my
daughter at last; and it is my only concern lest I should have
delayed too long。 She is ill; and very ill; … at death's door。
Nothing is left me but my daughter; my Emperor; and my honour; and
I give my honour; blame me for it who dare!'
At this my heart smote me。
'For God's sake;' I cried; 'think no more of what I have said! A
parole? what is a parole against life and death and love? I ask
your pardon; this gentleman's also。 As long as I shall be with
you; you shall not have cause to complain of me again。 I pray God
you will find your daughter alive and restored。'
'That is past praying for;' said the Colonel; and immediately the
brief fire died out of him; and; returning to the hearth; he
relapsed into his former abstraction。
But I was not so easy to compose。 The knowledge of the poor
gentleman's trouble; and the sight of his face; had filled me with
the bitterness of remorse; and I insisted upon shaking hands with
the Major (which he did with a very ill grace); and abounded in
palinodes and apologies。
'After all;' said I; 'who am I to talk? I am in the luck to be a
private soldier; I have no parole to give or to keep; once I am
over the rampart; I am as free as air。 I beg you to believe that I
regret from my soul the use of these ungenerous expressions。 Allow
me 。 。 。 Is there no way in this damned house to attract attention?
Where is this fellow; Fenn?'
I ran to one of the windows and threw it open。 Fenn; who was at
the moment passing below in the court; cast up his arms like one in
despair; called to me to keep back; plunged into the house; and
appeared next moment in the doorway of the chamber。
'Oh; sir!' says he; 'keep away from those there windows。 A body
might see you from the back lane。'
'It is registered;' said I。 'Henceforward I will be a mouse for
precaution and a ghost for invisibility。 But in the meantime; for
God's sake; fetch us a bottle of brandy! Your room is as damp as
the bottom of a well; and these gentlemen are perishing of cold。'
So soon as I had paid him (for everything; I found; must be paid in
advance); I turned my attention to the fire; and whether because I
threw greater energy into the business; or because the coals were
now warmed and the time ripe; I soon started a blaze that made the
chimney roar again。 The shine of it; in that dark; rainy day;
seemed to reanimate the Colonel like a blink of sun。 With the
outburst of the flames; besides; a draught was established; which
immediately delivered us from the plague of smoke; and by the time
Fenn returned; carrying a bottle under his arm and a single tumbler
in his hand; there was already an air of gaiety in the room that
did the heart good。
I poured out some of the brandy。
'Colonel;' said I; 'I am a young man and a private soldier。 I have
not been long in this room; and already I have shown the petulance
that belongs to the one character and the ill manners that you may
look for in the other。 Have the humanity to pass these slips over;
and honour me so far as to accept this glass。'
'My lad;' says he; waking up and blinking at me with an air of
suspicion; 'are you sure you can afford it?'
I assured him I could。
'I thank you; then: I am very cold。' He took the glass out; and a
little colour came in his face。 'I thank you again;' said he。 'It
goes to the heart。'
The Major; when I motioned him to help himself; did so with a good
deal of liberality; continued to do so for the rest of the morning;
now with some sort of apology; now with none at all; and the bottle
began to look foolish before dinner was served。 It was such a meal
as he had himself predicted: beef; greens; potatoes; mustard in a
teacup; and beer in a brown jug that was all over hounds; horses;
and hunters; with a fox at the fat end and a gigantic John Bull …
for all the world like Fenn … sitting in the midst in a bob…wig and
smoking tobacco。 The beer was a good brew; but not good enough for
the Major; he laced it with brandy … for his cold; he said; and in
this curative design the remainder of the bottle ebbed away。 He
called my attention repeatedly to the circumstance; helped me
pointedly to the dregs; threw the bottle in the air and played
tricks with it; and at last; having exhausted his ingenuity; and
seeing me remain quite blind to every hint; he ordered and paid for
another himself。
As for the Colonel; he ate nothing; sat sunk in a muse; and only
awoke occasionally to a sense of where he was; and what he was
supposed to be doing。 On each of these occasions he showed a
gratitude and kind courtesy that endeared him to me beyond
expression。 'Champdivers; my lad; your health!' he would say。
'The Major and I had a very arduous march last night; and I
positively thought I should have eaten nothing; but your fortunate
idea of the brandy has made quite a new man of me … quite a new
man。' And he would fall to with a great air of heartiness; cut
himself a mouthful; and; before he had swallowed it; would have
forgotten his dinner; his company; the place where he then was; and
the escape he was engaged on; and become absorbed in the vision of
a sick…room and a dying girl in France。 The pathos of this
continual preoccupation; in a man so old; sick; and over…weary; and
whom I looked upon as a mere bundle of dying bones and death…pains;
put me wholly from my victuals: it seemed there was an element of
sin; a kind of rude bravado of youth; in the mere relishing of food
at the same table with this tragic father; and though I was well
enough used to the coarse; plain diet of the English; I ate scarce
more than himself。 Dinner was hardly over before he succumbed to a
lethargic sleep; lying on one of the mattresses with his limbs
relaxed; and his breath seemingly suspended … the very image of
dissolution。
This left the Major and myself alone at the table。 You must not
suppose our TETE…A…TETE was long; but it was a lively period while
it lasted。 He drank like a fish or an Englishman; shouted; beat
the table; roared out songs; quarrelled; made it up again; and at
last tried to throw the dinner…plates through the window; a feat of
which he was at that time quite incapable。 For a party of
fugitives; condemned to the most rigorous discretion; there was
never seen so noisy a carnival; and through it all the Colonel
continued to sleep like a child。 Seeing the Major so well
advanced; and no retreat possible; I made a fair wind of a foul
one; keeping his glass full; pushing him with toasts; and sooner
than I could have dared to hope; he became drowsy and incoherent。
With the wrong…headedness of all such sots; he would not be
persuaded to lie down upon one of the mattresses until I had
stretched myself upon another。 But the comedy was soon over; soon
he slept the sleep of the just; and snored like a military music;
and I might get up again and face (as best I could) the excessive
tedium of the afternoon。
I had passed the night before in a good bed; I was denied the
resource of slumber; and there was nothing open for me but to pace
the apartment; maintain the fire; and brood on my position。 I
compared yesterday and to…day … the safety; comfort; jollity; open…
air exercise and pleasant roadside inns of the one; with the
tedium; anxiety; and discomfort of the other。 I remembered that I
was in the hands of Fenn; who could not be more false … though he
might be more vindictive … than I fancied him。 I looked forward to
nights of pitching in the covered cart; and days of monotony in I
knew not what hiding…places; and my heart failed me; and I was in
two minds whether to slink off ere it was too late; and return to
my former solitary way of travel。 But the Colonel stood in the
path。 I had not seen much of him; but already I judged him a man
of a childlike nature … with that sort of innocence and courtesy
that; I think; is only to be found in old soldiers or old priests …
and broken with years and sorrow。 I could not turn my back on his
distress; could not leave him alone with the selfish tr
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