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david copperfield(大卫.科波维尔)-第88部分

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they were only a pair (which they ain’t); they’d defy competition。 
Would you believe he tried to do without me—in the Life…Guards; 
too?’ 

‘Mad!’ said Steerforth。 

‘It looks like it。 However; mad or sane; he tried;’ returned Miss 
Mowcher。 ‘What does he do; but; lo and behold you; he goes into a 
perfumer’s shop; and wants to buy a bottle of the Madagascar 
Liquid。’ 

‘Charley does?’ said Steerforth。 

‘Charley does。 But they haven’t got any of the Madagascar 
Liquid。’ 

‘What is it? Something to drink?’ asked Steerforth。 

‘To drink?’ returned Miss Mowcher; stopping to slap his cheek。 
‘To doctor his own moustachios with; you know。 There was a 
woman in the shop—elderly female—quite a Griffin—who had 

Charles Dickens ElecBook Classics 


David Copperfield 

never even heard of it by name。 “Begging pardon; sir;” said the 
Griffin to Charley; “it’s not—not—not rouge; is it?” “Rouge;” said 
Charley to the Griffin。 “What the unmentionable to ears polite; do 
you think I want with rouge?” “No offence; sir;” said the Griffin; 
“we have it asked for by so many names; I thought it might be。” 
Now that; my child;’ continued Miss Mowcher; rubbing all the 
time as busily as ever; ‘is another instance of the refreshing 
humbug I was speaking of。 I do something in that way myself— 
perhaps a good deal—perhaps a little—sharp’s the word; my dear 
boy—never mind!’ 

‘In what way do you mean? In the rouge way?’ said Steerforth。 

‘Put this and that together; my tender pupil;’ returned the wary 
Mowcher; touching her nose; ‘work it by the rule of Secrets in all 
trades; and the product will give you the desired result。 I say I do a 
little in that way myself。 One Dowager; she calls it lip…salve。 
Another; she calls it gloves。 Another; she calls it tucker…edging。 
Another; she calls it a fan。 I call it whatever they call it。 I supply it 
for ’em; but we keep up the trick so; to one another; and make 
believe with such a face; that they’d as soon think of laying it on; 
before a whole drawing…room; as before me。 And when I wait upon 
’em; they’ll say to me sometimes—with it on—thick; and no 
mistake—“How am I looking; Mowcher? Am I pale?” Ha! ha! ha! 
ha! Isn’t that refreshing; my young friend!’ 

I never did in my days behold anything like Mowcher as she 
stood upon the dining table; intensely enjoying this refreshment; 
rubbing busily at Steerforth’s head; and winking at me over it。 

‘Ah!’ she said。 ‘Such things are not much in demand 
hereabouts。 That sets me off again! I haven’t seen a pretty woman 
since I’ve been here; jemmy。’ 

Charles Dickens ElecBook Classics 


David Copperfield 

‘No?’ said Steerforth。 

‘Not the ghost of one;’ replied Miss Mowcher。 

‘We could show her the substance of one; I think?’ said 
Steerforth; addressing his eyes to mine。 ‘Eh; Daisy?’ 

‘Yes; indeed;’ said I。 

‘Aha?’ cried the little creature; glancing sharply at my face; and 
then peeping round at Steerforth’s。 ‘Umph?’ 

The first exclamation sounded like a question put to both of us; 
and the second like a question put to Steerforth only。 She seemed 
to have found no answer to either; but continued to rub; with her 
head on one side and her eye turned up; as if she were looking for 
an answer in the air and were confident of its appearing presently。 

‘A sister of yours; Mr。 Copperfield?’ she cried; after a pause; 
and still keeping the same look…out。 ‘Aye; aye?’ 

‘No;’ said Steerforth; before I could reply。 ‘Nothing of the sort。 
On the contrary; Mr。 Copperfield used—or I am much mistaken— 
to have a great admiration for her。’ 

‘Why; hasn’t he now?’ returned Miss Mowcher。 ‘Is he fickle? 
Oh; for shame! Did he sip every flower; and change every hour; 
until Polly his passion requited?—Is her name Polly?’ 

The Elfin suddenness with which she pounced upon me with 
this question; and a searching look; quite disconcerted me for a 
moment。 

‘No; Miss Mowcher;’ I replied。 ‘Her name is Emily。’ 

‘Aha?’ she cried exactly as before。 ‘Umph? What a rattle I am! 
Mr。 Copperfield; ain’t I volatile?’ 

Her tone and look implied something that was not agreeable to 
me in connexion with the subject。 So I said; in a graver manner 
than any of us had yet assumed: ‘She is as virtuous as she is pretty。 

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David Copperfield 

She is engaged to be married to a most worthy and deserving man 
in her own station of life。 I esteem her for her good sense; as much 
as I admire her for her good looks。’ 

‘Well said!’ cried Steerforth。 ‘Hear; hear; hear! Now I’ll quench 
the curiosity of this little Fatima; my dear Daisy; by leaving her 
nothing to guess at。 She is at present apprenticed; Miss Mowcher; 
or articled; or whatever it may be; to Omer and Joram; 
Haberdashers; Milliners; and so forth; in this town。 Do you 
observe? Omer and Joram。 The promise of which my friend has 
spoken; is made and entered into with her cousin; Christian name; 
Ham; surname; Peggotty; occupation; boat…builder; also of this 
town。 She lives with a relative; Christian name; unknown; 
surname; Peggotty; occupation; seafaring; also of this town。 She is 
the prettiest and most engaging little fairy in the world。 I admire 
her—as my friend does—exceedingly。 If it were not that I might 
appear to disparage her Intended; which I know my friend would 
not like; I would add; that to me she seems to be throwing herself 
away; that I am sure she might do better; and that I swear she was 
born to be a lady。’ 

Miss Mowcher listened to these words; which were very slowly 
and distinctly spoken; with her head on one side; and her eye in 
the air as if she were still looking for that answer。 When he ceased 
she became brisk again in an instant; and rattled away with 
surprising volubility。 

‘Oh! And that’s all about it; is it?’ she exclaimed; trimming his 
whiskers with a little restless pair of scissors; that went glancing 
round his head in all directions。 ‘Very well: very well! Quite a long 
story。 Ought to end “and they lived happy ever afterwards”; 
oughtn’t it? Ah! What’s that game at forfeits? I love my love with 

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David Copperfield 

an E; because she’s enticing; I hate her with an E; because she’s 
engaged。 I took her to the sign of the exquisite; and treated her 
with an elopement; her name’s Emily; and she lives in the east? 
Ha! ha! ha! Mr。 Copperfield; ain’t I volatile?’ 

Merely looking at me with extravagant slyness; and not waiting 
for any reply; she continued; without drawing breath: 

‘There! If ever any scapegrace was trimmed and touched up to 
perfection; you are; Steerforth。 If I understand any noddle in the 
world; I understand yours。 Do you hear me when I tell you that; 
my darling? I understand yours;’ peeping down into his face。 ‘Now 
you may mizzle; jemmy (as we say at Court); and if Mr。 
Copperfield will take the chair I’ll operate on him。’ 

‘What do you say; Daisy?’ inquired Steerforth; laughing; and 
resigning his seat。 ‘Will you be improved?’ 

‘Thank you; Miss Mowcher; not this evening。’ 

‘Don’t say no;’ returned the little woman; looking at me with the 
aspect of a connoisseur; ‘a little bit more eyebrow?’ 

‘Thank you;’ I returned; ‘some other time。’ 

‘Have it carried half a quarter of an inch towards the temple;’ 
said Miss Mowcher。 ‘We can do it in a fortnight。’ 

‘No; I thank you。 Not at present。’ 

‘Go in for a tip;’ she urged。 ‘No? Let’s get the scaffolding up; 
then; for a pair of whiskers。 Come!’ 

I could not help blushing as I declined; for I felt we were on my 
weak point; now。 But Miss Mowcher; finding that I was not at 
present disposed for any decoration within the range of her art; 
and that I was; for the time being; proof against the blandishments 
of the small bottle which she held up before one eye to enforce her 
persuasions; said we would make a beginning on an early day; and 

Charles Dickens ElecBook Classics 


David Copperfield 

requested the aid of my hand to descend from her elevated station。 
Thus assisted; she skipped down with much agility; and began to 
tie her double chin into her bonnet。 

‘The fee;’ said Steerforth; ‘is—’ 

‘Five bob;’ replied Miss Mowcher; ‘and dirt cheap; my chicken。 
Ain’t I volatile; Mr。 Copperfield?’ 

I replied politely: ‘Not at all。’ But I thought she was rather so; 
when she tossed up his two half…crowns like a goblin pieman; 
caught them; dropped them in her pocket; and gave it a loud slap。 

‘That’s the Till!’ observed Miss Mowcher; standing at the chair 
again; and replacing in the bag a miscellaneous collection of little 
objects she had emptied out of it。 ‘Have I got all my traps? It seems 
so。 It won’t do to be like long Ned Beadwood; when they took him 
to church “to marry him to somebody”; as he says; and left the 
bride behind。 Ha! ha! ha! A wicked rascal; Ned; but droll! Now; I 
know I’m going to break your hearts; but I am forced to leave you。 
You
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