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seraphita-第6部分

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〃Nothing; David; I am too weary。〃



Seraphitus unfastened his pelisse lined with sable; threw it over him;

and fell asleep。 The old servant stood for several minutes gazing with

loving eyes at the singular being before him; whose sex it would have

been difficult for any one at that moment to determine。 Wrapped as he

was in a formless garment; which resembled equally a woman's robe and

a man's mantle; it was impossible not to fancy that the slender feet

which hung at the side of the couch were those of a woman; and equally

impossible not to note how the forehead and the outlines of the head

gave evidence of power brought to its highest pitch。



〃She suffers; and she will not tell me;〃 thought the old man。 〃She is

dying; like a flower wilted by the burning sun。〃



And the old man wept。







CHAPTER II



SERAPHITA



Later in the evening David re…entered the salon。



〃I know who it is you have come to announce;〃 said Seraphita in a

sleepy voice。 〃Wilfrid may enter。〃



Hearing these words a man suddenly presented himself; crossed the room

and sat down beside her。



〃My dear Seraphita; are you ill?〃 he said。 〃You look paler than

usual。〃



She turned slowly towards him; tossing back her hair like a pretty

woman whose aching head leaves her no strength even for complaint。



〃I was foolish enough to cross the fiord with Minna;〃 she said。 〃We

ascended the Falberg。〃



〃Do you mean to kill yourself?〃 he said with a lover's terror。



〃No; my good Wilfrid; I took the greatest care of your Minna。〃



Wilfrid struck his hand violently on a table; rose hastily; and made

several steps towards the door with an exclamation full of pain; then

he returned and seemed about to remonstrate。



〃Why this disturbance if you think me ill?〃 she said。



〃Forgive me; have mercy!〃 he cried; kneeling beside her。 〃Speak to me

harshly if you will; exact all that the cruel fancies of a woman lead

you to imagine I least can bear; but oh; my beloved; do not doubt my

love。 You take Minna like an axe to hew me down。 Have mercy!〃



〃Why do you say these things; my friend; when you know that they are

useless?〃 she replied; with a look which grew in the end so soft that

Wilfrid ceased to behold her eyes; but saw in their place a fluid

light; the shimmer of which was like the last vibrations of an Italian

song。



〃Ah! no man dies of anguish!〃 he murmured。



〃You are suffering?〃 she said in a voice whose intonations produced

upon his heart the same effect as that of her look。 〃Would I could

help you!〃



〃Love me as I love you。〃



〃Poor Minna!〃 she replied。



〃Why am I unarmed!〃 exclaimed Wilfrid; violently。



〃You are out of temper;〃 said Seraphita; smiling。 〃Come; have I not

spoken to you like those Parisian women whose loves you tell of?〃



Wilfrid sat down; crossed his arms; and looked gloomily at Seraphita。

〃I forgive you;〃 he said; 〃for you know not what you do。〃



〃You mistake;〃 she replied; 〃every woman from the days of Eve does

good and evil knowingly。〃



〃I believe it〃; he said。



〃I am sure of it; Wilfrid。 Our instinct is precisely that which makes

us perfect。 What you men learn; we feel。〃



〃Why; then; do you not feel how much I love you?〃



〃Because you do not love me。〃



〃Good God!〃



〃If you did; would you complain of your own sufferings?〃



〃You are terrible to…night; Seraphita。 You are a demon。〃



〃No; but I am gifted with the faculty of comprehending; and it is

awful。 Wilfrid; sorrow is a lamp which illumines life。〃



〃Why did you ascend the Falberg?〃



〃Minna will tell you。 I am too weary to talk。 You must talk to me;

you who know so much; who have learned all things and forgotten

nothing; you who have passed through every social test。 Talk to me;

amuse me; I am listening。〃



〃What can I tell you that you do not know? Besides; the request is

ironical。 You allow yourself no intercourse with social life; you

trample on its conventions; its laws; its customs; sentiments; and

sciences; you reduce them all to the proportions such things take when

viewed by you beyond this universe。〃



〃Therefore you see; my friend; that I am not a woman。 You do wrong to

love me。 What! am I to leave the ethereal regions of my pretended

strength; make myself humbly small; cringe like the hapless female of

all species; that you may lift me up? and then; when I; helpless and

broken; ask you for help; when I need your arm; you will repulse me!

No; we can never come to terms。〃



〃You are more maliciously unkind to…night than I have ever known you。〃



〃Unkind!〃 she said; with a look which seemed to blend all feelings

into one celestial emotion; 〃no; I am ill; I suffer; that is all。

Leave me; my friend; it is your manly right。 We women should ever

please you; entertain you; be gay in your presence and have no whims

save those that amuse you。 Come; what shall I do for you; friend?

Shall I sing; shall I dance; though weariness deprives me of the use

of voice and limbs?Ah! gentlemen; be we on our deathbeds; we yet

must smile to please you; you call that; methinks; your right。 Poor

women! I pity them。 Tell me; you who abandon them when they grow old;

is it because they have neither hearts nor souls? Wilfrid; I am a

hundred years old; leave me! leave me! go to Minna!〃



〃Oh; my eternal love!〃



〃Do you know the meaning of eternity? Be silent; Wilfrid。 You desire

me; but you do not love me。 Tell me; do I not seem to you like those

coquettish Parisian women?〃



〃Certainly I no longer find you the pure celestial maiden I first saw

in the church of Jarvis。〃



At these words Seraphita passed her hands across her brow; and when

she removed them Wilfrid was amazed at the saintly expression that

overspread her face。



〃You are right; my friend;〃 she said; 〃I do wrong whenever I set my

feet upon your earth。〃



〃Oh; Seraphita; be my star! stay where you can ever bless me with that

clear light!〃



As he spoke; he stretched forth his hand to take that of the young

girl; but she withdrew it; neither disdainfully nor in anger。 Wilfrid

rose abruptly and walked to the window that she might not see the

tears that rose to his eyes。



〃Why do you weep?〃 she said。 〃You are not a child; Wilfrid。 Come back

to me。 I wish it。 You are annoyed if I show just displeasure。 You see

that I am fatigued and ill; yet you force me to think and speak; and

listen to persuasions and ideas that weary me。 If you had any real

perception of my nature; you would have made some music; you would

have lulled my feelingsbut no; you love me for yourself and not for

myself。〃



The storm which convulsed the young man's heart calmed down at these

words。 He slowly approached her; letting his eyes take in the

seductive creature who lay exhausted before him; her head resting in

her hand and her elbow on the couch。



〃You think that I do not love you;〃 she resumed。 〃You are mistaken。

Listen to me; Wilfrid。 You are beginning to know much; you have

suffered much。 Let me explain your thoughts to you。 You wished to take

my hand just now〃; she rose to a sitting posture; and her graceful

motions seemed to emit light。 〃When a young girl allows her hand to be

taken it is as though she made a promise; is it not? and ought she not

to fulfil it? You well know that I cannot be yours。 Two sentiments

divide and inspire the love of all the women of the earth。 Either they

devote themselves to suffering; degraded; and criminal beings whom

they desire to console; uplift; redeem; or they give themselves to

superior men; sublime and strong; whom they adore and seek to

comprehend; and by whom they are often annihilated。 You have been

degraded; though now you are purified by the fires of repentance; and

to…day you are once more noble; but I know myself too feeble to be

your equal; and too religious to bow before any power but that On

High。 I may refer thus to your life; my friend; for we are in the

North; among the clouds; where all things are abstractions。〃



〃You stab me; Seraphita; when you speak like this。 It wounds me to

hear you apply the dreadful knowledge with which you strip from all

things human the properties that time and space and form have given

them; and consider them mathematically in the abstract; as geometry

treats substances from which it extracts solidity。〃



〃Well; I will respect your wishes; Wilfrid。 Let the subject drop。 Tell

me what you think of this bearskin rug which my poor David has spread

out。〃



〃It is very handsome。〃



〃Did you ever see me wear this 'doucha greka'?〃



She pointed to a pelisse made of cashmere and lined with the skin of

the black fox;the name she gave it signifying 〃warm to the soul。〃



〃Do you believe that any sovereign has a fur that can equal it?〃 she

asked。



〃It is worthy of her who wears it。〃



〃And whom you think beautiful?〃



〃Human words do not a
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