fantastic fables-第13部分

快捷操作: 按键盘上方向键 ← 或 → 可快速上下翻页 按键盘上的 Enter 键可回到本书目录页 按键盘上方向键 ↑ 可回到本页顶部! 如果本书没有阅读完，想下次继续接着阅读，可使用上方 "收藏到我的浏览器" 功能 和 "加入书签" 功能！



disturbed。







〃I　am　wealth；　I　am　respectability；〃　the　Fortune　explained；　〃I　am　



elegant　houses；　a　yacht；　and　a　clean　shirt　every　day。　　I　am　



leisure；　I　am　travel；　wine；　a　shiny　hat；　and　an　unshiny　coat。　　I　am　



enough　to　eat。〃







〃All　right；〃　said　the　Writer　of　Fables；　in　a　whisper；　〃but　for　



goodness'　sake　speak　lower。〃







〃Why　so？〃　the　Fortune　asked；　in　surprise。







〃So　as　not　to　wake　me；〃　replied　the　Writer　of　Fables；　a　holy　calm　



brooding　upon　his　beautiful　face。















A　Smiling　Idol















AN　Idol　said　to　a　Missionary；　〃My　friend；　why　do　you　seek　to　bring　



me　into　contempt？　　If　it　had　not　been　for　me；　what　would　you　have　



been？　　Remember　thy　creator　that　thy　days　be　long　in　the　land。〃







〃I　confess；〃　replied　the　Missionary；　fingering　a　number　of　ten…cent　



pieces　which　a　Sunday…school　in　his　own　country　had　forwarded　to　



him；　〃that　I　am　a　product　of　you；　but　I　protest　that　you　cannot　



quote　Scripture　with　accuracy　and　point。　　Therefore　will　I　continue　



to　go　up　against　you　with　the　Sword　of　the　Spirit。〃







Shortly　afterwards　the　Idol's　worshippers　held　a　great　religious　



ceremony　at　the　base　of　his　pedestal；　and　as　a　part　of　the　rites　



the　Missionary　was　roasted　whole。　　As　the　tongue　was　removed　for　



the　high　priest's　table；　〃Ah；〃　said　the　Idol　to　himself；　〃that　is　



the　Sword　of　the　Spirit　…　the　only　Sword　that　is　less　dangerous　



when　unsheathed。〃







And　he　smiled　so　pleasantly　at　his　own　wit　that　the　provinces　of　



Ghargaroo；　M'gwana；　and　Scowow　were　affected　with　a　blight。















Philosophers　Three















A　BEAR；　a　Fox；　and　an　Opossum　were　attacked　by　an　inundation。







〃Death　loves　a　coward；〃　said　the　Bear；　and　went　forward　to　fight　



the　flood。







〃What　a　fool！〃　said　the　Fox。　　〃I　know　a　trick　worth　two　of　that。〃　　



And　he　slipped　into　a　hollow　stump。







〃There　are　malevolent　forces；〃　said　the　Opossum；　〃which　the　wise　



will　neither　confront　nor　avoid。　　The　thing　is　to　know　the　nature　



of　your　antagonist。〃







So　saying　the　Opossum　lay　down　and　pretended　to　be　dead。















The　Boneless　King















SOME　Apes　who　had　deposed　their　king　fell　at　once　into　dissension　



and　anarchy。　　In　this　strait　they　sent　a　Deputation　to　a　



neighbouring　tribe　to　consult　the　Oldest　and　Wisest　Ape　in　All　the　



World。







〃My　children；〃　said　the　Oldest　and　Wisest　Ape　in　All　the　World；　



when　he　had　heard　the　Deputation；　〃you　did　right　in　ridding　



yourselves　of　tyranny；　but　your　tribe　is　not　sufficiently　advanced　



to　dispense　with　the　forms　of　monarchy。　　Entice　the　tyrant　back　



with　fair　promises；　kill　him　and　enthrone。　　The　skeleton　of　even　



the　most　lawless　despot　makes　a　good　constitutional　sovereign。〃







At　this　the　Deputation　was　greatly　abashed。　　〃It　is　impossible；〃　



they　said；　moving　away；　〃our　king　has　no　skeleton；　he　was　stuffed。〃















Uncalculating　Zeal















A　MAN…EATING　tiger　was　ravaging　the　Kingdom　of　Damnasia；　and　the　



King；　greatly　concerned　for　the　lives　and　limbs　of　his　Royal　



subjects；　promised　his　daughter　Zodroulra　to　any　man　who　would　kill　



the　animal。　　After　some　days　Camaraladdin　appeared　before　the　King　



and　claimed　the　reward。







〃But　where　is　the　tiger？〃　the　King　asked。







〃May　jackasses　sing　above　my　uncle's　grave；〃　replied　Camaraladdin；　



〃if　I　dared　go　within　a　league　of　him！〃







〃Wretch！〃　cried　the　King；　unsheathing　his　consoler…under…



disappointment；　〃how　dare　you　claim　my　daughter　when　you　have　done　



nothing　to　earn　her？〃







〃Thou　art　wiser；　O　King；　than　Solyman　the　Great；　and　thy　servant　is　



as　dust　in　the　tomb　of　thy　dog；　yet　thou　errest。　　I　did　not；　it　is　



true；　kill　the　tiger；　but　behold！　　I　have　brought　thee　the　scalp　of　



the　man　who　had　accumulated　five　million　pieces　of　gold　and　was　



after　more。〃







The　King　drew　his　consoler…under…disappointment；　and；　flicking　off　



Camaraladdin's　head；　said：







〃Learn；　caitiff；　the　expediency　of　uncalculating　zeal。　　If　the　



millionaire　had　been　let　alone　he　would　have　devoured　the　tiger。〃















A　Transposition















TRAVELLING　through　the　sage…brush　country　a　Jackass　met　a　rabbit；　



who　exclaimed　in　great　astonishment：







〃Good　heavens！　how　did　you　grow　so　big？　　You　are　doubtless　the　



largest　rabbit　living。〃







〃No；〃　said　the　Jackass；　〃you　are　the　smallest　donkey。〃







After　a　good　deal　of　fruitless　argument　the　question　was　referred　



for　decision　to　a　passing　Coyote；　who　was　a　bit　of　a　demagogue　and　



desirous　to　stand　well　with　both。







〃Gentlemen；〃　said　he；　〃you　are　both　right；　as　was　to　have　been　



expected　by　persons　so　gifted　with　appliances　for　receiving　



instruction　from　the　wise。　　You；　sir；〃　…　turning　to　the　superior　



animal　…　〃are；　as　he　has　accurately　observed；　a　rabbit。　　And　you〃　…　



to　the　other　…　〃are　correctly　described　as　a　jackass。　　In　



transposing　your　names　man　has　acted　with　incredible　folly。〃







They　were　so　pleased　with　the　decision　that　they　declared　the　



Coyote　their　candidate　for　the　Grizzly　Bearship；　but　whether　he　



ever　obtained　the　office　history　does　not　relate。















The　Honest　Citizen















A　POLITICAL　Preferment；　labelled　with　its　price；　was　canvassing　the　



State　to　find　a　purchaser。　　One　day　it　offered　itself　to　a　Truly　



Good　Man；　who；　after　examining　the　label　and　finding　the　price　was　



exactly　twice　as　great　as　he　was　willing　to　pay；　spurned　the　



Political　Preferment　from　his　door。　　Then　the　People　said：　〃Behold；　



this　is　an　honest　citizen！〃　　And　the　Truly　Good　Man　humbly　



confessed　that　it　was　so。















A　Creaking　Tail















AN　American　Statesman　who　had　twisted　the　tail　of　the　British　Lion　



until　his　arms　ached　was　at　last　rewarded　by　a　sharp；　rasping　



sound。







〃I　knew　your　fortitude　would　give　out　after　a　while；〃　said　the　



American　Statesman；　delighted；　〃your　agony　attests　my　political　



power。〃







〃Agony　I　know　not！〃　said　the　British　Lion；　yawning；　〃the　swivel　in　



my　tail　needs　a　few　drops　of　oil；　that　is　all。〃















Wasted　Sweets















A　CANDIDATE　canvassing　his　district　met　a　Nurse　wheeling　a　Baby　in　



a　carriage；　and；　stooping；　imprinted　a　kiss　upon　the　Baby's　clammy　



muzzle。　　Rising；　he　saw　a　Man；　who　laughed。







〃Why　do　you　laugh？〃　asked　the　Candidate。







〃Because；〃　replied　the　Man；　〃the　Baby　belongs　to　the　Orphan　



Asylum。〃







〃But　the　Nurse；〃　said　the　Candidate　…　〃the　Nurse　will　surely　relate　



the　touching　incident　wherever　she　goes；　and　perhaps　write　to　her　



former　master。〃







〃The　Nurse；〃　said　the　Man　who　had　laughed；　〃is　an　inmate　of　the　



Institution　for　the　Illiterate…Deaf…and…Dumb。〃















Six　and　One















THE　Committee　on　Gerrymander　worked　late；　drawing　intricate　lines　



on　a　map　of　the　State；　and　being　weary　sought　repose　in　a　game　of　



poker。　　At　the　close　of　the　game　the　six　Republican　members　were　



bankrupt　and　the　single　Democrat　had　all　the　money。　　On　the　next　



day；　when　the　Committee　was　called　to　order　for　business；　one　of　



the　luckless　six　mounted　his　legs；　and　said：







〃Mr。　Chairman；　before　we　bend　to　our　noble　task　of　purifying　



politics；　in　the　interest　of　good　government　I　wish　to　say　a　word　



of　the　untoward　events　of　last　evening。　　If　my　memory　serves　me　the　



disasters　which　overtook　the　Majority　of　this　honourable　body　



always　befell　when　it　was　the　Minority's　deal。　　It　is　my　solemn　



conviction；　Mr。　Chairman；　and　to　its　affirmation　I　pledge　my　life；　



my　fortune；　and　my　sacred　honour；　that　that　wicked　and　unscrupulous　



Minority　redistricted　the　cards！〃















The　Sportsman　and　the　Squirrel















A　SPORTSMAN　who　had　wounded　a　Squirrel；　which　was　making　desperate　



efforts　to　drag　itself　away；　ran　after　it　with　a　stick；　exclaiming：







〃Poor　thing！　　I　will　put　it　out　of　its　misery。〃







At　that　moment　the　Squirrels　stopped　from　exhaustion；　and　looking　



up　at　its　enemy；　said：







〃I　don't　venture　to　doubt　the　sincerity　of　your　compassion；　though　



it　comes　rather　late；　but　you　seem　to　lack　the　faculty　of　



observation。　　Do　you　not　perceive　by　my　actions　that　the　dearest　



wish　of　my　heart　is　to　continue　in　my　misery？〃







At　this　exposure　of　his　hypocrisy；　the　Sportsman　was　so　overcome　



with　shame　and　remorse　that　he　would　not　strike　the　Squirrel；　but　



pointing　it　out　to　his　dog；　walked　thoughtfully　away。















The　Fogy　and　the　Sheik















A　FOGY　who　lived　in　a　cave　near　a　great　caravan　route　returned　to　



his　home　one　day　and　saw；　near　by；　a　great　concourse　of　m