the frozen deep-第8部分

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thrown　against　you。〃

〃Go　or　stay；〃　reiterated　Wardour；　〃it's　all　one　to　me。　You　will
be　luckier；　young　one；　when　you　cast　for　yourself。〃

Frank　cast　for　himself。

〃Eight。　Hurrah！　I　go！〃

〃What　did　I　tell　you？〃　said　Wardour。　〃The　chance　was　yours。　You
have　thriven　on　my　ill　luck。〃

He　rose；　as　he　spoke；　to　leave　the　hut。　Crayford　stopped　him。

〃Have　you　anything　particular　to　do；　Richard？〃

〃What　has　anybody　to　do　here？〃

〃Wait　a　little；　then。　I　want　to　speak　to　you　when　this　business
is　over。〃

〃Are　you　going　to　give　me　any　more　good　advice？〃

〃Don't　look　at　me　in　that　sour　way；　Richard。　I　am　going　to　ask
you　a　question　about　something　which　concerns　yourself。〃

Wardour　yielded　without　a　word　more。　He　returned　to　his　chest；
and　cynically　composed　himself　to　slumber。　The　casting　of　the
lots　went　on　rapidly　among　the　officers　and　men。　In　another
half…hour　chance　had　decided　the　question　of　〃Go〃　or　〃Stay〃　for
all　alike。　The　men　left　the　hut。　The　officers　entered　the　inner
apartment　for　a　last　conference　with　the　bed…ridden　captain　of
the　_Sea…mew_。　Wardour　and　Crayford　were　left　together；　alone。



Chapter　9。


Crayford　touched　his　friend　on　the　shoulder　to　rouse　him。　Wardour
looked　up；　impatiently；　with　a　frown。

〃I　was　just　asleep；〃　he　said。　〃Why　do　you　wake　me？〃

〃Look　round　you；　Richard。　We　are　alone。〃

〃Welland　what　of　that？〃

〃I　wish　to　speak　to　you　privately；　and　this　is　my　opportunity。
You　have　disappointed　and　surprised　me　to…day。　Why　did　you　say　it
was　all　one　to　you　whether　you　went　or　stayed？　Why　are　you　the
only　man　among　us　who　seems　to　be　perfectly　indifferent　whether
we　are　rescued　or　not？〃

〃Can　a　man　always　give　a　reason　for　what　is　strange　in　his　manner
or　his　words？〃　Wardour　retorted。

〃He　can　try；〃　said　Crayford；　quietly〃when　his　friend　asks　him。〃

Wardour's　manner　softened。

〃That's　true；〃　he　said。　〃I　_will_　try。　Do　you　remember　the　first
night　at　sea　when　we　sailed　from　England　in　the　_Wanderer_？〃

〃As　well　as　if　it　was　yesterday。〃

〃A　calm；　still　night；〃　the　other　went　on；　thoughtfully。　〃No
clouds；　no　stars。　Nothing　in　the　sky　but　the　broad　moon；　and
hardly　a　ripple　to　break　the　path　of　light　she　made　in　the　quiet
water。　Mine　was　the　middle　watch　that　night。　You　cam　e　on　deck；
and　found　me　alone〃

He　stopped。　Crayford　took　his　hand；　and　finished　the　sentence　for
him。

〃Aloneand　in　tears。〃

〃The　last　I　shall　ever　shed；〃　Wardour　added；　bitterly。

〃Don't　say　that！　There　are　times　when　a　man　is　to　be　pitied
indeed；　if　he　can　shed　no　tears。　Go　on；　Richard。〃

Wardour　proceededstill　following　the　old　recollections；　still
preserving　his　gentler　tones。

〃I　should　have　quarreled　with　any　other　man　who　had　surprised　me
at　that　moment；〃　he　said。　〃There　was　something；　I　suppose；　in
your　voice　when　you　asked　my　pardon　for　disturbing　me；　that
softened　my　heart。　I　told　you　I　had　met　with　a　disappointment
which　had　broken　me　for　life。　There　was　no　need　to　explain
further。　The　only　hopeless　wretchedness　in　this　world　is　the
wretchedness　that　women　cause。〃

〃And　the　only　unalloyed　happiness；〃　said　Crayford；　〃the　happiness
that　women　bring。〃

〃That　may　be　your　experience　of　them；〃　Wardour　answered；　〃mine　is
different。　All　the　devotion；　the　patience；　the　humility；　the
worship　that　there　is　in　man；　I　laid　at　the　feet　of　a　woman。　She
accepted　the　offering　as　women　doaccepted　it；　easily；
gracefully；　unfeelinglyaccepted　it　as　a　matter　of　course。　I
left　England　to　win　a　high　place　in　my　profession；　before　I　dared
to　win　_her_。　I　braved　danger；　and　faced　death。　I　staked　my　life
in　the　fever　swamps　of　Africa；　to　gain　the　promotion　that　I　only
desired　for　her　sakeand　gained　it。　I　came　back　to　give　her　all；
and　to　ask　nothing　in　return；　but　to　rest　my　weary　heart　in　the
sunshine　of　her　smile。　And　her　own　lipsthe　lips　I　had　kissed　at
partingtold　me　that　another　man　had　robbed　me　of　her。　I　spoke
but　few　words　when　I　heard　that　confession；　and　left　her　forever。
'The　time　may　come；'　I　told　her；　'when　I　shall　forgive　_you_。　But
the　man　who　has　robbed　me　of　you　shall　rue　the　day　when　you　and
he　first　met。'　Don't　ask　me　who　he　was！　I　have　yet　to　discover
him。　The　treachery　had　been　kept　secret；　nobody　could　tell　me
where　to　find　him；　nobody　could　tell　me　who　he　was。　What　did　it
matter？　When　I　had　lived　out　the　first　agony；　I　could　rely　on
myselfI　could　be　patient；　and　bide　my　time。〃

〃Your　time？　What　time？〃

〃The　time　when　I　and　that　man　shall　meet　face　to　face。　I　knew　it
then；　I　know　it　nowit　was　written　on　my　heart　then；　it　is
written　on　my　heart　nowwe　two　shall　meet　and　know　each　other！
With　that　conviction　strong　within　me；　I　volunteered　for　this
service；　as　I　would　have　volunteered　for　anything　that　set　work
and　hardship　and　danger；　like　ramparts；　between　my　misery　and　me。
With　that　conviction　strong　within　me　still；　I　tell　you　it　is　no
matter　whether　I　stay　here　with　the　sick；　or　go　hence　with　the
strong。　I　shall　live　till　I　have　met　that　man！　There　is　a　day　of
reckoning　appointed　between　us。　Here　in　the　freezing　cold；　or
away　in　the　deadly　heat；　in　battle　or　in　shipwreck；　in　the　face
of　starvation；　under　the　shadow　of　pestilenceI；　though　hundreds
are　falling　round　me；　I　shall　live！　live　for　the　coming　of　one
day！　live　for　the　meeting　with　one　man！〃

He　stopped；　trembling；　body　and　soul；　under　the　hold　that　his　own
terrible　superstition　had　fastened　on　him。　Crayford　drew　back　in
silent　horror。　Wardour　noticed　the　actionhe　resented　ithe
appealed；　in　defense　of　his　one　cherished　conviction；　to
Crayford's　own　experience　of　him。

〃Look　at　me！〃　he　cried。　〃Look　how　I　have　lived　and　thriven；　with
the　heart…ache　gnawing　at　me　at　home；　and　the　winds　of　the　icy
north　whistling　round　me　here！　I　am　the　strongest　man　among　you。
Why？　I　have　fought　through　hardships　that　have　laid　the
best…seasoned　men　of　all　our　party　on　their　backs。　Why？　What　have
_I_　done；　that　my　life　should　throb　as　bravely　through　every　vein
in　my　body　at　this　minute；　and　in　this　deadly　place；　as　ever　it
did　in　the　wholesome　breezes　of　home？　What　am　I　preserved　for？　I
tell　you　again；　for　the　coming　of　one　dayfor　the　meeting　with
one　man。〃

He　paused　once　more。　This　time　Crayford　spoke。

〃Richard！〃　he　said；　〃since　we　first　met；　I　have　believed　in　your
better　nature；　against　all　outward　appearance。　I　have　believed　in
you；　firmly；　truly；　as　your　brother　might。　You　are　putting　that
belief　to　a　hard　test。　If　your　enemy　had　told　me　that　you　had
ever　talked　as　you　talk　now；　that　you　had　ever　looked　as　you　look
now；　I　would　have　turned　my　back　on　him　as　the　utterer　of　a　vile
calumny　against　a　just；　a　brave；　an　upright　man。　Oh！　my　friend；
my　friend；　if　ever　I　have　deserved　well　of　you；　put　away　these
thoughts　from　your　heart！　Face　me　again；　with　the　stainless　look
of　a　man　who　has　trampled　under　his　feet　the　bloody　superstitions
of　revenge；　and　knows　them　no　more！　Never；　never；　let　the　time
come　when　I　cannot　offer　you　my　hand　as　I　offer　it　now；　to　the
man　I　can　still　admireto　the　brother　I　can　still　love！〃

The　heart　that　no　other　voice　could　touch　felt　that　appeal。　The
fierce　eyes；　the　hard　voice；　softened　under　Crayford's　influence。
Richard　Wardour's　head　sank　on　his　breast。

〃You　are　kinder　to　me　than　I　deserve；〃　he　said。　〃Be　kinder　still；
and　forget　what　I　have　been　talking　about。　No！　no　more　about　me；
I　am　not　worth　it。　We'll　change　the　subject；　and　never　go　back　to
it　again。　Let's　do　something。　Work；　Crayfordthat's　the　true
elixir　of　our　life！　Work；　that　stretches　the　muscles　and　sets　the
blood　a…glowing。　Work；　that　tires　the　body　and　rests　the　mind。　Is
there　nothing　in　hand　that　I　can　do？　Nothing　to　cut？　nothing　to
carry？〃

The　door　opened　as　he　put　the　question。　Batesonappointed　to
chop　Frank's　bed…place　into　firingappeared　punctually　with　his
ax。　Wardour；　without　a　word　of　warning；　snatched　the　ax　out　of
the　man's　hand。

〃What　was　this　wanted　for？〃　he　asked。

〃To　cut　up　Mr。　Aldersley's　berth　there　into　firing；　sir。〃

〃I'll　do　it　for　you！　I'll　have　it　down　in　no　time！〃　He　turned　to
Crayford。　〃You　needn't　be　afraid　about　me；　old　friend。　I　am　going
to　do　the　right　thing。　I　am　going　to　tire　my　body　and　rest　my
mind。〃

The　evil　spirit　in　him　was　plainly　subduedfor　the　time；　at
least。　Crayford　took　his　hand　in　silence；　and　then　（followed　by
Bateson）　left　him　to　his　work。



Chapter　10。


Ax　in　hand；　Wardour　approached　Frank's　bed…place。

〃If　I　could　only　cut　the　thoughts　out　of　me；〃　he　said　to　himself；
〃as　I　am　going　to　cut　the　billets　out　of　this　wood！〃　He　attacked
the　bed…place　with　the　ax；　like　a　man　who　well　knew　the　use　of
his　instrument。　〃Oh　me！〃　he　thought；　sadly；　〃if　I　had　only　been
born　a　carpenter　instead　of　a　gentleman！　A　good　ax；　Master
BatesonI　wonder　where　you　got　it？　Something　like　a　grip；　my
man；　on　this　handle。　Poor　Crayford！　his　words　stick　in　my　throat。
A　fine　fellow！　a　noble　fellow！　No　use　thinking；　no　use
regretting；　what　is　said；　is　said。　Work！　work！　work！〃

Plank　after　plank　fell　out　on　the　floor。　He　laughed　over　the　easy
task　of　destruction。　〃Aha！　young　Aldersley！　It　doesn't　take　much
to　demolish　your　bed…place。　I'll　have　it　down！　I　would　have　the
whole　hut