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a mortal antipathy-第6部分
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aerial hint of his personality in the far distance always awakens in
my mind pleasant remembrances and tender reflections。 A whole
neighborhood rises up before me: the barn; with its haymow; where the
hens laid their eggs to hatch; and we boys hid our apples to ripen;
both occasionally illustrating the sic vos non vobis; the shed; where
the annual Tragedy of the Pig was acted with a realism that made
Salvini's Othello seem but a pale counterfeit; the rickety old
outhouse; with the 〃corn…chamber〃 which the mice knew so well; the
paved yard; with its open gutter;these and how much else come up at
the hint of my far…off friend; who is my very near enemy。 Nothing is
more familiar than the power of smell in reviving old memories。
There was that quite different fragrance of the wood…house; the smell
of fresh sawdust。 It comes back to me now; and with it the hiss of
the saw; the tumble of the divorced logs which God put together and
man has just put asunder; the coming down of the axe and the hah!
that helped it;the straight…grained stick opening at the first
appeal of the implement as if it were a pleasure; and the stick with
a knot in the middle of it that mocked the blows and the hahs! until
the beetle and wedge made it listen to reason;there are just such
straight…grained and just such knotty men and women。 All this passes
through my mind while Biddy; whose parlor…name is Angela; contents
herself with exclaiming 〃egh!*******!〃
How different distances were in those young days of which I am
thinking! From the old house to the old yellow meeting…house; where
the head of the family preached and the limbs of the family listened;
was not much more than two or three times the width of Commonwealth
Avenue。 But of a hot summer's afternoon; after having already heard
one sermon; which could not in the nature of things have the charm of
novelty of presentation to the members of the home circle; and the
theology of which was not too clear to tender apprehensions; with
three hymns more or less lugubrious; rendered by a village…choir; got
into voice by many preliminary snuffles and other expiratory efforts;
and accompanied by the snort of a huge bassviol which wallowed
through the tune like a hippopotamus; with other exercises of the
customary character;after all this in the forenoon; the afternoon
walk to the meeting…house in the hot sun counted for as much; in my
childish dead…reckoning; as from old Israel Porter's in Cambridge to
the Exchange Coffeehouse in Boston did in after years。 It takes a
good while to measure the radius of the circle that is about us; for
the moon seems at first as near as the watchface。 Who knows but
that; after a certain number of ages; the planet we live on may seem
to us no bigger than our neighbor Venus appeared when she passed
before the sun a few months ago; looking as if we could take her
between our thumb and finger; like a bullet or a marble? And time;
too; how long was it from the serious sunrise to the joyous 〃sun…
down〃 of an old…fashioned; puritanical; judaical first day of the
week; which a pious fraud christened 〃the Sabbath〃? Was it a
fortnight; as we now reckon duration; or only a week? Curious
entities; or non…entities; space and tithe? When you see a
metaphysician trying to wash his hands of them and get rid of these
accidents; so as to lay his dry; clean palm on the absolute; does
it not remind you of the hopeless task of changing the color of the
blackamoor by a similar proceeding? For space is the fluid in which
he is washing; and time is the soap which he is using up in the
process; and he cannot get free from them until he can wash himself
in a mental vacuum。
In my reference to the old house in a former paper; published years
ago; I said;
〃By and by the stony foot of the great University will plant itself
on this whole territory; and the private recollections which clung so
tenaciously to the place and its habitations will have died with
those who cherished them。〃
What strides the great University has taken since those words were
written! During all my early years our old Harvard Alma Mater sat
still and lifeless as the colossi in the Egyptian desert。 Then all
at once; like the statue in Don Giovanni; she moved from her
pedestal。 The fall of that 〃stony foot〃 has effected a miracle like
the harp that Orpheus played; like the teeth which Cadmus sowed。 The
plain where the moose and the bear were wandering while Shakespeare
was writing Hamlet; where a few plain dormitories and other needed
buildings were scattered about in my school…boy days; groans under
the weight of the massive edifices which have sprung up all around
them; crowned by the tower of that noble structure which stands in
full view before me as I lift my eyes from the portfolio on the back
of which I am now writing。
For I must be permitted to remind you that I have not yet opened it。
I have told you that I have just finished a long memoir; and that it
has cost me no little labor to overcome some of its difficulties;if
I have overcome them; which others must decide。 And I feel exactly
as honest Dobbin feels when his harness is slipped off after a long
journey with a good deal of up…hill work。 He wants to rest a little;
then to feed a little; then; if you will turn him loose in the
pasture; he wants to roll。 I have left my starry and ethereal
companionship;not for a long time; I hope; for it has lifted me
above my common self; but for a while。 And now I want; so to speak;
to roll in the grass and among the dandelions with the other
pachyderms。 So I have kept to the outside of the portfolio as yet;
and am disporting myself in reminiscences; and fancies; and vagaries;
and parentheses。
How well I understand the feeling which led the Pisans to load their
vessels with earth from the Holy Land; and fill the area of the Campo
Santo with that sacred soil! The old house stood upon about as
perverse a little patch of the planet as ever harbored a half…starved
earth…worm。 It was as sandy as Sahara and as thirsty as Tantalus。
The rustic aid…de…camps of the household used to aver that all
fertilizing matters 〃leached〃 through it。 I tried to disprove their
assertion by gorging it with the best of terrestrial nourishment;
until I became convinced that I was feeding the tea…plants of China;
and then I gave over the attempt。 And yet I did love; and do love;
that arid patch of ground。 I wonder if a single flower could not be
made to grow in a pot of earth from that Campo Santo of my childhood!
One noble product of nature did not refuse to flourish there;the
tall; stately; beautiful; soft…haired; many…jointed; generous maize
or Indian corn; which thrives on sand and defies the blaze of our
shrivelling summer。 What child but loves to wander in its forest…
like depths; amidst the rustling leaves and with the lofty tassels
tossing their heads high above him! There are two aspects of the
cornfield which always impress my imagination: the first when it has
reached its full growth; and its ordered ranks look like an army on
the march with its plumed and bannered battalions; the second when;
after the battle of the harvest; the girdled stacks stand on the
field of slaughter like so many ragged Niobes;say rather like the
crazy widows and daughters of the dead soldiery。
Once more let us come back to the old house。 It was far along in its
second century when the edict went forth that it must stand no
longer。
The natural death of a house is very much like that of one of its
human tenants。 The roof is the first part to show the distinct signs
of age。 Slates and tiles loosen and at last slide off; and leave
bald the boards that supported them; shingles darken and decay; and
soon the garret or the attic lets in the rain and the snow; by and by
the beams sag; the floors warp; the walls crack; the paper peels
away; the ceilings scale off and fall; the windows are crusted with
clinging dust; the doors drop from their rusted hinges; the winds
come in without knocking and howl their cruel death…songs through the
empty rooms and passages; and at last there comes a crash; a great
cloud of dust rises; and the home that had been the shelter of
generation after generation finds its grave in its own cellar。 Only
the chimney remains as its monument。 Slowly; little by little; the
patient solvents that find nothing too hard for their chemistry pick
out the mortar from between the bricks; at last a mighty wind roars
around it and rushes against it; and the monumental relic crashes
down among the wrecks it has long survived。 So dies a human
habitation left to natural decay; all that was seen above the surface
of the soil sinking gradually below it;
Till naught remains the saddening tale to tell
Save home's last wrecks; the cellar and the well。
But if this sight is saddening; what is it to see a human dw
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