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the story of a pioneer-第10部分

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ence{sic} climbed up and up。  The largest amount I

could earn at teaching was six dollars a week; and

our school year included only two terms of thir…

teen weeks each。  It was an incessant struggle to

keep our land; to pay our taxes; and to live。  Cal…

ico was selling at fifty cents a yard。  Coffee was

one dollar a pound。  There were no men left to

grind our corn; to get in our crops; or to care for

our live stock; and all around us we saw our

struggle reflected in the lives of our neighbors。



At long intervals word came to us of battles in

which my father's regimentthe Tenth Michigan

Cavalry Volunteersor those of my brothers were

engaged; and then longer intervals followed in which

we heard no news。  After Eleanor's death my

brother Tom was wounded; and for months we lived

in terror of worse tidings; but he finally recovered。 

I was walking seven and eight miles a day; and doing

extra work before and after school hours; and my

health began to fail。  Those were years I do not

like to look back uponyears in which life had de…

generated into a treadmill whose monotony was

broken only by the grim messages from the front。 

My sister Mary married and went to Big Rapids to

live。  I had no time to dream my dream; but the star

of my one purpose still glowed in my dark horizon。 

It seemed that nothing short of a miracle could lift

my feet from their plodding way and set them on the

wider path toward which my eyes were turned; but

I never lost faith that in some manner the miracle

would come to pass。  As certainly as I have ever

known anything; I KNEW that I was going to college!





III



HIGH…SCHOOL AND COLLEGE DAYS



The end of the Civil War brought freedom to

me; too。  When peace was declared my father

and brothers returned to the claim in the wilderness

which we women of the family had labored so des…

perately to hold while they were gone。  To us; as to

others; the final years of the war had brought many

changes。  My sister Eleanor's place was empty。 

Mary; as I have said; had married and gone to live in

Big Rapids; and my mother and I were alone with my

brother Harry; now a boy of fourteen。  After the

return of our men it was no longer necessary to de…

vote every penny of my earnings to the maintenance

of our home。  For the first time I could begin to

save a portion of my income toward the fulfilment

of my college dream; but even yet there was a long;

arid stretch ahead of me before the college doors

came even distantly into sight。



The largest salary I could earn by teaching in our

Northern woods was one hundred and fifty…six dollars

a year; for two terms of thirteen weeks each; and

from this; of course; I had to deduct the cost of my

board and clothingthe sole expenditure I allowed

myself。  The dollars for an education accumulated

very; very slowly; until at last; in desperation; weary

of seeing the years of my youth rush past; bearing

my hopes with them; I took a sudden and radical

step。  I gave up teaching; left our cabin in the

woods; and went to Big Rapids to live with my sister

Mary; who had married a successful man and who

generously offered me a home。  There; I had de…

cided; I would learn a trade of some kind; of any

kind; it did not greatly matter what it was。  The

sole essential was that it should be a money…making

trade; offering wages which would make it possible

to add more rapidly to my savings。  In those days;

almost fifty years ago; and in a small pioneer town;

the fields open to women were few and unfruitful。 

The needle at once presented itself; but at first I

turned with loathing from it。  I would have pre…

ferred the digging of ditches or the shoveling of coal;

but the needle alone persistently pointed out my

way; and I was finally forced to take it。



Fate; however; as if weary at last of seeing me

between her paws; suddenly let me escape。  Before

I had been working a month at my uncongenial

trade Big Rapids was favored by a visit from a

Universalist woman minister; the Reverend Marianna

Thompson; who came there to preach。  Her ser…

mon was delivered on Sunday morning; and I was; I

think; almost the earliest arrival of the great con…

gregation which filled the church。  It was a wonder…

ful moment when I saw my first woman minister

enter her pulpit; and as I listened to her sermon;

thrilled to the soul; all my early aspirations to be…

come a minister myself stirred in me with cumulative

force。  After the services I hung for a time on the

fringe of the group that surrounded her; and at last;

when she was alone and about to leave; I found

courage to introduce myself and pour forth the tale

of my ambition。  Her advice was as prompt as if

she had studied my problem for years。



‘‘My child;'' she said; ‘‘give up your foolish idea

of learning a trade; and go to school。  You can't do

anything until you have an education。  Get it; and

get it NOW。''



Her suggestion was much to my liking; and I paid

her the compliment of acting on it promptly; for

the next morning I entered the Big Rapids High

School; which was also a preparatory school for col…

lege。  There I would study; I determined; as long

as my money held out; and with the optimism of

youth I succeeded in confining my imagination to

this side of that crisis。  My home; thanks to Mary;

was assured; the wardrobe I had brought from the

woods covered me sufficiently; to one who had

walked five and six miles a day for years; walking

to school held no discomfort; and as for pleasure;

I found it; like a heroine of fiction; in my studies。 

For the first time life was smiling at me; and with

all my young heart I smiled back。



The preceptress of the high school was Lucy

Foot; a college graduate and a remarkable woman。 

I had heard much of her sympathy and understand…

ing; and on the evening following my first day in

school I went to her and repeated the confidences

I had reposed in the Reverend Marianna Thompson。 

My trust in her was justified。  She took an immedi…

ate interest in me; and proved it at once by putting

me into the speaking and debating classes; where I

was given every opportunity to hold forth to help…

less classmates when the spirit of eloquence moved

me。



As an aid to public speaking I was taught to ‘‘elo…

cute;'' and I remember in every mournful detail

the occasion on which I gave my first recitation。 

We were having our monthly ‘‘public exhibition

night;'' and the audience included not only my class…

mates; but their parents and friends as well。  The

selection I intended to recite was a poem entitled

‘‘No Sects in Heaven;'' but when I faced my au…

dience I was so appalled by its size and by the sud…

den realization of my own temerity that I fainted

during the delivery of the first verse。  Sympathetic

classmates carried me into an anteroom and revived

me; after which they naturally assumed that the

entertainment I furnished was over for the evening。 

I; however; felt that if I let that failure stand against

me I could never afterward speak in public; and

within ten minutes; notwithstanding the protests

of my friends; I was back in the hall and beginning

my recitation a second time。  The audience gave

me its eager attention。  Possibly it hoped to see me

topple off the platform again; but nothing of the

sort occurred。  I went through the recitation with

self…possession and received some friendly applause at

the end。  Strangely enough; those first sensations of

‘‘stage fright'' have been experienced; in a lesser de…

gree; in connection with each of the thousands of

public speeches I have made since that time。  I

have never again gone so far as to faint in the

presence of an audience; but I have invariably

walked out on the platform feeling the sinking sen…

sation at the pit of the stomach; the weakness of the

knees; that I felt in the hour of my debut。  Now;

however; the nervousness passes after a moment

or two。



From that night Miss Foot lost no opportunity of

putting me into the foreground of our school affairs。 

I took part in all our debates; recited yards of poe…

try to any audience we could attract; and even shone

mildly in our amateur theatricals。  It was probably

owing to all this activity that I attracted the in…

terest of the presiding elder of our districtDr。

Peck; a man of progressive ideas。  There was at

that time a movement on foot to license women to

preach in the Methodist Church; and Dr。 Peck was

ambitious to be the first presiding elder to have a

woman ordained for the Methodist ministry。  He

had urged Miss Foot to be this pioneer; but her

ambitions did not turn in that direction。  Though

she was a very devout Methodist; she had no wish

to be the shepherd of a religious flock。  She loved

her school…work; and asked nothing better than to

remain in it。  Gently but persistently she directed

the attent
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