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the vicar of wakefield-第25部分
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as thine。'
'Indeed; Sir;' replied she; 'he owes all his triumph to the desire I had of making him; and not myself; happy。 I knew that the ceremony of our marriage; which was privately performed by a popish priest; was no way binding; and that I had nothing to trust to but his honour。' 'What;' interrupted I; 'and were you indeed married by a priest; and in orders?''Indeed; Sir; we were;' replied she; 'though we were both sworn to conceal his name。' 'Why then; my child; come to my arms again; and now you are a thousand times more welcome than before; for you are now his wife to all intents and purposes; nor can all the laws of man; tho' written upon tables of adamant; lessen the force of that sacred connexion。'
'Alas; Papa;' replied she; 'you are but little acquainted with his villainies: he has been married already; by the same priest; to six or eight wives more; whom; like me; he has deceived and abandoned。'
'Has he so?' cried I; 'then we must hang the priest; and you shall inform against him to…morrow。''But Sir;' returned she; 'will that be right; when I am sworn to secrecy?''My dear;' I replied; 'if you have made such a promise; I cannot; nor will I tempt you to break it。 Even tho' it may benefit the public; you must not inform against him。 In all human institutions a smaller evil is allowed to procure a greater good; as in politics; a province may be given away to secure a kingdom; in medicine; a limb may be lopt off; to preserve the body。 But in religion the law is written; and inflexible; never to do evil。 And this law; my child; is right: for otherwise; if we commit a smaller evil; to procure a greater good; certain guilt would be thus incurred; in expectation of contingent advantage。 And though the advantage should certainly follow; yet the interval between commission and advantage; which is allowed to be guilty; may be that in which we are called away to answer for the things we have done; and the volume of human actions is closed for ever。 But I interrupt you; my dear; go on。'
'The very next morning;' continued she; 'I found what little expectations I was to have from his sincerity。 That very morning he introduced me to two unhappy women more; whom; like me; he had deceived; but who lived in contented prostitution。 I loved him too tenderly to bear such rivals in his affections; and strove to forget my infamy in a tumult of pleasures。 With this view; I danced; dressed; and talked; but still was unhappy。 The gentlemen who visited there told me every moment of the power of my charms; and this only contributed to encrease my melancholy; as I had thrown all their power quite away。 Thus each day I grew more pensive; and he more insolent; till at last the monster had the assurance to offer me to a young Baronet of his acquaintance。 Need I describe; Sir; how his ingratitude stung me。 My answer to this proposal was almost madness。 I desired to part。 As I was going he offered me a purse; but I flung it at him with indignation; and burst from him in a rage; that for a while kept me insensible of the miseries of my situation。 But I soon looked round me; and saw myself a vile; abject; guilty thing; without one friend in the world to apply to。 Just in that interval; a stage… coach happening to pass by; I took a place; it being my only aim to be driven at a distance from a wretch I despised and detested。 I was set down here; where; since my arrival; my own anxiety; and this woman's unkindness; have been my only companions。 The hours of pleasure that I have passed with my mamma and sister; now grow painful to me。 Their sorrows are much; but mine is greater than theirs; for mine are mixed with guilt and infamy。'
'Have patience; my child;' cried I; 'and I hope things will yet be better。 Take some repose to…night; and to…morrow I'll carry you home to your mother and the rest of the family; from whom you will receive a kind reception。 Poor woman; this has gone to her heart: but she loves you still; Olivia; and will forget it。
CHAPTER 22
Offences are easily pardoned where there is love at bottom
The next morning I took my daughter behind me; and set out on my return home。 As we travelled along; I strove; by every persuasion; to calm her sorrows and fears; and to arm her with resolution to bear the presence of her offended mother。 I took every opportunity; from the prospect of a fine country; through which we passed; to observe how much kinder heaven was to us; than we to each other; and that the misfortunes of nature's making were very few。 I assured her; that she should never perceive any change in my affections; and that during my life; which yet might be long; she might depend upon a guardian and an instructor。 I armed her against the censures of the world; shewed her that books were sweet unreproaching companions to the miserable; and that if they could not bring us to enjoy life; they would at least teach us to endure it。
The hired horse that we rode was to be put up that night at an inn by the way; within about five miles from my house; and as I was willing to prepare my family for my daughter's reception; I determined to leave her that night at the inn; and to return for her; accompanied by my daughter Sophia; early the next morning。 It was night before we reached our appointed stage: however; after seeing her provided with a decent apartment; and having ordered the hostess to prepare proper refreshments; I kissed her; and proceeded towards home。 And now my heart caught new sensations of pleasure the nearer I approached that peaceful mansion。 As a bird that had been frighted from its nest; my affections out…went my haste; and hovered round my little fire…side; with all the rapture of expectation。 I called up the many fond things I had to say; and anticipated the welcome I was to receive。 I already felt my wife's tender embrace; and sniiled at the joy of my little ones。 As I walked but slowly; the night wained apace。 The labourers of the day were all retired to rest; the lights were out in every cottage; no sounds were heard but of the shrilling cock; and the deep…mouthed watch…dog; at hollow distance。 I approached my little abode of pleasure; and before I was within a furlong of the place; our honest mastiff came running to welcome me。
It was now near mid…night that I came to knock at my door: all was still and silent: my heart dilated with unutterable happiness; when; to my amazement; I saw the house bursting out in a blaze of fire; and every apperture red with conflagration! I gave a loud convulsive outcry; and fell upon the pavement insensible。 This alarmed my son; who had till this been asleep; and he perceiving the flames; instantly waked my wife and daughter; and all running out; naked; and wild with apprehension; recalled me to life with their anguish。 But it was only to objects of new terror; for the flames had; by this time; caught the roof of our dwelling; part after part continuing to fall in; while the family stood; with silent agony; looking on; as if they enjoyed the blaze。 I gazed upon them and upon it by turns; and then looked round me for my two little ones; but they were not to be seen。 O misery! 'Where;' cried I; 'where are my little ones?'… …'They are burnt to death in the flames;' says my wife calmly; 'and I will die with them。'That moment I heard the cry of the babes within; who were just awaked by the fire; and nothing could have stopped me。 'Where; where; are my children?' cried I; rushing through the flames; and bursting the door of the chamber in which they were confined; 'Where are my little ones?''Here; dear papa; here we are;' cried they together; while the flames were just catching the bed where they lay。 I caught them both in my arms; and snatched them through the fire as fast as possible; while just as I was got out; the roof sunk in。 'Now;' cried I; holding up my children; 'now let the flames burn on; and all my possessions perish。 Here they are; I have saved my; treasure。 Here; my dearest; here are our treasures; and we shall yet be happy。' We kissed our little darlings a thousand times; they clasped us round the neck; and seemed to share our transports; while their mother laughed and wept by turns。
I now stood a calm spectator of the flames; and after some time; began to perceive that my arm to the shoulder was scorched in a terrible manner。 It was therefore out of my power to give my son any assistance; either in attempting to save our goods; or preventing the flames spreading to our corn。 By this time; the neighbours were alarmed; and came running to our assistance; but all they could do was to stand; like us; spectators of the calamity。 My goods; among which were the notes I had reserved for my daughters' fortunes; were entirely consumed; except a box; with some papers that stood in the kitchen; and two or three things more of little consequence; which my son brought away in the beginning。 The neighbours contributed; however; what they could to lighten our distress。 They brought us cloaths; and furnished one of our out…houses with kitchen utensils; so that by day…light we had another; tho' a wretched; dwelling to retire to。 My honest next neighbour; and his children; were not the least assiduous in providing us with every thing necessary; and offering what ever conso
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