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father goriot(高老头)-第27部分
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eeks; all about me people say; 'What a beautiful woman that is!' and it does my heart good to hear them。
〃Are they not my own flesh and blood? I love the very horses that draw them; I envy the little lap…dog on their knees。 Their happiness is my life。 Every one loves after his own fashion; and mine does no one any harm; why should people trouble their heads about me? I am happy in my own way。 Is there any law against going to see my girls in the evening when they are going out to a ball? And what a disappointment it is when I get there too late; and am told that 'Madame has gone out!' Once I waited till three o'clock in the morning for Nasie; I had not seen her for two whole days。 I was so pleased; that it was almost too much for me! Please do not speak of me unless it is to say how good my daughters are to me。 They are always wanting to heap presents upon me; but I will not have it。 'Just keep your money;' I tell them。 'What should I do with it? I want nothing。' And what am I; sir; after all? An old carcase; whose soul is always where my daughters are。 When you have seen Mme。 de Nucingen; tell me which you like the most;〃 said the old man after a moment's pause; while Eugene put the last touches to his toilette。 The student was about to go out to walk in the Garden of the Tuileries until the hour when he could venture to appear in Mme。 de Beauseant's drawing…room。
That walk was a turning…point in Eugene's career。 Several women noticed him; he looked so handsome; so young; and so well dressed。 This almost admiring attention gave a new turn to his thoughts。 He forgot his sisters and the aunt who had robbed herself for him; he no longer remembered his own virtuous scruples。 He had seen hovering above his head the fiend so easy to mistake for an angel; the Devil with rainbow wings; who scatters rubies; and aims his golden shafts at palace fronts; who invests women with purple; and thrones with a glory that dazzles the eyes of fools till they forget the simple origins of royal dominion; he had heard the rustle of that Vanity whose tinsel seems to us to be the symbol of power。 However cynical Vautrin's words had been; they had made an impression on his mind; as the sordid features of the old crone who whispers; 〃A lover; and gold in torrents;〃 remain engraven on a young girl's memory。
Eugene lounged about the walks till it was nearly five o'clock; then he went to Mme。 de Beauseant; and received one of the terrible blows against which young hearts are defenceless。 Hitherto the Vicomtesse had received him with the kindly urbanity; the bland grace of manner that is the result of fine breeding; but is only complete when it comes from the heart。
Today Mme。 de Beauseant bowed constrainedly; and spoke curtly:
〃M。 de Rastignac; I cannot possibly see you; at least not at this moment。 I am engaged 。 。 。〃
An observer; and Rastignac instantly became an observer; could read the whole history; the character and customs of caste; in the phrase; in the tones of her voice; in her glance and bearing。 He caught a glimpse of the iron hand beneath the velvet glove the personality; the egoism beneath the manner; the wood beneath the varnish。 In short; he heard that unmistakable I THE KING that issues from the plumed canopy of the throne; and finds its last echo under the crest of the simplest gentleman。
Eugene had trusted too implicitly to the generosity of a woman; he could not believe in her haughtiness。 Like all the unfortunate; he had subscribed; in all good faith; the generous compact which should bind the benefactor to the recipient; and the first article in that bond; between two large…hearted natures; is a perfect equality。 The kindness which knits two souls together is as rare; as divine; and as little understood as the passion of love; for both love and kindness are the lavish generosity of noble natures。 Rastignac was set upon going to the Duchesse de Carigliano's ball; so he swallowed down this rebuff。
〃Madame;〃 he faltered out; 〃I would not have come to trouble you about a trifling matter; be so kind as to permit me to see you later; I can wait。〃
〃Very well; come and dine with me;〃 she said; a little confused by the harsh way in which she had spoken; for this lady was as genuinely kind…hearted as she was high…born。
Eugene was touched by this sudden relenting; but none the less he said to himself as he went away; 〃Crawl in the dust; put up with every kind of treatment。 What must the rest of the world be like when one of the kindest of women forgets all her promises of befriending me in a moment; and tosses me aside like an old shoe? So it is every one for himself? It is true that her house is not a shop; and I have put myself in the wrong by needing her help。 You should cut your way through the world like a cannon ball; as Vautrin said。〃
But the student's bitter thoughts were soon dissipated by the pleasure which he promised himself in this dinner with the Vicomtesse。 Fate seemed to determine that the smallest accidents in his life should combine to urge him into a career; which the terrible sphinx of the Maison Vauquer had described as a field of battle where you must either slay or be slain; and cheat to avoid being cheated。 You leave your conscience and your heart at the barriers; and wear a mask on entering into this game of grim earnest; where; as in ancient Sparta; you must snatch your prize without being detected if you would deserve the crown。
On his return he found the Vicomtesse gracious and kindly; as she had always been to him。 They went together to the dining…room; where the Vicomte was waiting for his wife。 In the time of the Restoration the luxury of the table was carried; as is well known; to the highest degree; and M。 de Beauseant; like many jaded men of the world; had few pleasures left but those of good cheer; in this matter; in fact; he was a gourmand of the schools of Louis XVIII。 and of the Duc d'Escars; and luxury was supplemented by splendor。 Eugene; dining for the first time in a house where the traditions of grandeur had descended through many generations; had never seen any spectacle like this that now met his eyes。 In the time of the Empire; balls had always ended with a supper; because the officers who took part in them must be fortified for immediate service; and even in Paris might be called upon to leave the ballroom for the battlefield。 This arrangement had gone out of fashion under the Monarchy; and Eugene had so far only been asked to dances。 The self…possession which pre…eminently distinguished him in later life already stood him in good stead; and he did not betray his amazement。 Yet as he saw for the first time the finely wrought silver plate; the completeness of every detail; the sumptuous dinner; noiselessly served; it was difficult for such an ardent imagination not to prefer this life of studied and refined luxury to the hardships of the life which he had chosen only that morning。
His thoughts went back for a moment to the lodging…house; and with a feeling of profound loathing; he vowed to himself that at New Year he would go; prompted at least as much by a desire to live among cleaner surroundings as by a wish to shake off Vautrin; whose huge hand he seemed to feel on his shoulder at that moment。 When you consider the numberless forms; clamorous or mute; that corruption takes in Paris; common…sense begins to wonder what mental aberration prompted the State to establish great colleges and schools there; and assemble young men in the capital; how it is that pretty women are respected; or that the gold coin displayed in the money…changer's wooden saucers does not take to itself wings in the twinkling of an eye; and when you come to think further; how comparatively few cases of crime there are; and to count up the misdemeanors committed by youth; is there not a certain amount of respect due to these patient Tantaluses who wrestle with themselves and nearly always come off victorious? The struggles of the poor student in Paris; if skilfully drawn; would furnish a most dramatic picture of modern civilization。
In vain Mme。 de Beauseant looked at Eugene as if asking him to speak; the student was tongue…tied in the Vicomte's presence。
〃Are you going to take me to the Italiens this evening?〃 the Vicomtesse asked her husband。
〃You cannot doubt that I should obey you with pleasure;〃 he answered; and there was a sarcastic tinge in his politeness which Eugene did not detect; 〃but I ought to go to meet some one at the Varietes。〃
〃His mistress;〃 said she to herself。
〃Then; is not Ajuda coming for you this evening?〃 inquired the Vicomte。
〃No;〃 she answered; petulantly。
〃Very well; then; if you really must have an arm; take that of M。 de Rastignac。〃
The Vicomtess turned to Eugene with a smile。
〃That would be a very compromising step for you;〃 she said。
〃 'A Frenchman loves danger; because in danger there is glory;' to quote M。 de Chateaubriand;〃 said Rastignac; with a bow。
A few moments later he was sitting beside Mme。 de Beauseant in a brougham; that whirled them through the streets of Paris to a fashionable theatre。 It seemed to him that some fairy magic had suddenly transported him into a box facing the stage。 All the lorgnettes of the house were pointed
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