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the daisy chain, or aspirations-第17部分

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Her reflections were broken off。  Dr。 May exclaimed; 〃Ethel; don't
make such a figure of yourself。  Those muddy ankles and petticoats
are not fit to be seenthere; now you are sweeping the pavement。
Have you no medium?  One would think you had never worn a gown in
your life before!〃

Poor Ethel stepped on before with mud…encrusted heels; and her father
speaking sharply in the weariness and soreness of his heart; her
draggle…tailed petticoats weighing down at once her missionary
projects at Cocksmoor; and her tender visions of comforting her
widowed father; her heart was full to overflowing; and where was the
mother to hear her troubles?

She opened the hall door; and would have rushed upstairs; but nurse
happened to be crossing the hall。  〃Miss Ethel!  Miss Ethel; you
aren't going up with them boots on!  I do declare you are just like
one of the boys。  And your frock!〃

Ethel sat submissively down on the lowest step; and pulled off her
boots。  As she did so; her father and brother came inthe former
desiring Richard to come with him to the study; and write a note for
him。  She hoped that thus she might have Margaret to herself; and
hurried into her room。  Margaret was alone; maids and children at
tea; and Flora dressing。  The room was in twilight; with the red
gleam of the fire playing cheerfully over it。

〃Well; Ethel; have you had a pleasant walk?〃

〃YesnoOh; Margaret!〃 and throwing herself across the bottom of
the bed; she burst into tears。

〃Ethel; dear; what is the matter?  Papa〃

〃Nonoonly I draggled my frock; and Richard threw cold water。  And
I am good for nothing!  Oh! if mamma was but here!〃

〃Darling Ethel; dear Ethel; I wish I could comfort you。  Come a
little nearer to me; I can't reach you!  Dear Ethel; what has gone
wrong?〃

〃Everything;〃 said Ethel。  〃NoI'm too dirty to come on your white
bed; I forgot; you won't like it;〃 added she; in an injured tone。

〃You are wet; you are cold; you are tired;〃 said Margaret。  〃Stay
here and dress; don't go up in the cold。  There; sit by the fire pull
off your frock and stockings; and we will send for the others。  Let
me see you look comfortablethere。  Now tell me who threw cold
water。〃

〃It was figurative cold water;〃 said Ethel; smiling for a moment。  〃I
was only silly enough to tell Richard my plan; and it's horrid to
talk to a person who only thinks one high…flying and nonsensicaland
then came the dirt。〃

〃But what was the scheme; Ethel?〃

〃Cocksmoor;〃 said Ethel; proceeding to unfold it。

〃I wish we could;〃 said Margaret。  〃It would be an excellent thing。
But how did Richard vex you?〃

〃I don't know;〃 said Ethel; 〃only he thought it would not do。
Perhaps he said right; but it was coldly; and he smiled。〃

〃He is too sober…minded for our flights;〃 said Margaret。  I know the
feeling of it; Ethel dear; but you know if he did see that some of
your plans might not answer; it is no reason you should not try to do
something at once。  You have not told me about the girl。〃

Ethel proceeded to tell the history。  〃There!〃 said Margaret
cheerfully; 〃there are two ways of helping Cocksmoor already。  Could
you not make some clothes for the two grandchildren?  I could help
you a little; and then; if they were well clothed; you might get them
to come to the Sunday…school。  And as to the twins; I wonder what the
hire of a cart would be to bring the christening party?  It is just
what Richard could manage。〃

〃Yes;〃 said Ethel; 〃but those are only little isolated individual
things! 〃

〃But one must make a beginning。〃

〃Then; Margaret; you think it was a real vow?  You don't think it
silly of me?〃 said Ethel wistfully。

〃Ethel; dear; I don't think dear mamma would say we ought to make
vows; except what the church decrees for us。  I don't think she would
like the notion of your considering yourself pledged; but I do think;
that; after all you have said and felt about Cocksmoor; and being led
there on that day; it does seem as if we might be intended to make it
our especial charge。〃

〃Oh; Margaret; I am glad you say so。  You always understand。〃

〃But you know we are so young; that now we have not her to judge for
us; we must only do little things that we are quite sure of; or we
shall get wrong。〃

〃That's not the way great things were done。〃

〃I don't know; Ethel; I think great things can't be good unless they
stand on a sure foundation of little ones。〃

〃Well; I believe Richard was right; and it would not do to begin on
Sunday; but he was so tame; and then my frock; and the horrid
deficiency in those little neatnesses。〃

〃Perhaps that is good for you in one way; you might get very high…
flying if you had not the discipline of those little tiresome things;
correcting them will help you; and keep your high things trom being
all romance。  I know dear mamma used to say so; that the trying to
conquer them was a help to you。  Oh; here's Mary!  Mary; will you get
Ethel's dressing things?  She has come home wet…footed and cold; and
has been warming herself by my fire。〃

Mary was happy to help; and Ethel was dressed and cheered by the time
Dr。 May came in; for a hurried visit and report of his doings; Flora
followed on her way from her room。  Then all went to tea; leaving
Margaret to have a visit from the little ones under charge of nurse。
Two hours' stay with her; that precious time when she knew that sad
as the talk often was; it was truly a comfort to him。  It ended when
ten o'clock struck; and he went downMargaret hearing the bell; the
sounds of the assembling servants; the shutting of the door; the
stillness of prayer…time; the opening again; the feet moving off in
different directions; then brothers and sisters coming in to kiss her
and bid her good…night; nurse and Flora arranging her for the night;
Flora coming to sleep in her little bed in the corner of the room;
and; lastly; her father's tender good…night; and melancholy look at
her; and all was quiet; except the low voices and movements as
Richard attended him in his own room。

Margaret could think: 〃Dear; dear Ethel; how noble and high she is!
But I am afraid!  It is what people call a difficult; dangerous age;
and the grander she is; the greater danger of not managing her
rightly。  If those high purposes should run only into romance like
mine; or grow out into eccentricities and unfemininesses; what a
grievous pity it would be!  And I; so little older; so much less
clever; with just sympathy enough not to be a wise restraintI am
the person who has the responsibility; and oh; what shall I do?
Mamma trusted to me to be a mother to them; papa looks to me; and I
so unfit; besides this helplessness。  But God sent it; and put me in
my place。  He made me lie here; and will raise me up if it is good;
so I trust He will help me with my sisters。〃

〃Grant me to have a right judgment in all things; and evermore to
rejoice in Thy holy comfort。〃




CHAPTER VII。



Something between a hindrance and a help。
                                    WORDSWORTH。


Etheldred awoke long before time for getting up; and lay pondering
over her visions。  Margaret had sympathised; and therefore they did
not seem entirely aerial。  To earn money by writing was her favourite
plan; and she called her various romances in turn before her memory;
to judge which might be brought down to sober pen and ink。  She
considered till it became not too unreasonably early to get up。  It
was dark; but there was a little light close to the window: she had
no writing…paper; but she would interline her old exercise…book。
Down she ran; and crouching in the school…room window…seat; she wrote
on in a trance of eager composition; till Norman called her; as he
went to school; to help him to find a book。

This done; she went up to visit Margaret; to tell her the story; and
consult her。  But this was not so easy。  She found Margaret with
little Daisy lying by her; and Tom sitting by the fire over his
Latin。

〃Oh; Ethel; good…morning; dear! you are come just in time。〃

〃To take baby?〃 said Ethel; as the child was fretting a little。

〃Yes; thank you; she has been very good; but she was tired of lying
here; and I can't move her about;〃 said Margaret。

〃Oh; Margaret; I have such a plan;〃 said Ethel; as she walked about
with little Gertrude; but Tom interrupted。

〃Margaret; will you see if I can say my lesson?〃 and the thumbed
Latin grammar came across her just as Dr。 May's door opened; and he
came in exclaiming; 〃Latin grammar!  Margaret; this is really too
much for you。  Good…morning; my dears。  Ha! Tommy; take your book
away; my boy。  You must not inflict that on sister now。  There's your
regular master; Richard; in my room; if it is fit for his ears yet。
What; the little one here too?〃

〃How is your arm; papa?〃 said Margaret。  〃Did it keep you awake?〃

〃Not longit set me dreaming though; and a very romantic dream it
was; worthy of Ethel herself。〃

〃What was it; papa?〃

〃Oh; it was an odd thing; joining on strangely enough with one I had
three or four and twenty years ago; when I was a young man; hearing
lectures at Edinburgh; and courting〃he stopped; and felt Margaret's
pulse; asked her a few questions; and t
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