the daisy chain, or aspirations-第48部分

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〃At　Mr。　Edward　Wilmot's？〃

〃No！〃

〃Could　it　have　been　at　Dr。　May's？　　Really；　then；　you　must　tell　me。〃

〃There　I　you　deserve　a　good　long　story；　beginning　at　the　beginning；〃
said　Meta；　clapping　her　hands；　〃wasn't　it　curious？　as　we　were　coming
up　the　last　hill；　we　met　some　girls　in　deep　mourning；　with　a　lady　who
looked　like　their　governess。　　I　wondered　whether　they　could　be　Dr。
May's　daughters；　and　so　it　turned　out　they　were。

Presently　there　began　to　fall　little　square　lumps；　neither　hail；　nor
snow；　nor　rain；　it　grew　very　cold；　and　rain　came　on。　　It　would　have
been　great　fun；　if　I　had　not　been　afraid　papa　would　catch　cold；　and
he　said　we　would　canter　on　to　the　inn。　　But；　luckily；　there　was　Dr。
May　walking　up　the　street；　and　he　begged　us　to　come　into　his　house。
I　was　so　glad！　　We　were　tolerably　wet；　and　Dr。　May　said　something
about　hoping　the　girls　were　at　home；　well；　when　he　opened　the
drawing…room　door；　there　was　the　poor　daughter　lying　on　the　sofa。〃

〃Poor　girl！　tell　me　of　her。〃

〃Oh！　you　must　go　and　see　her；　you　won't　look　at　her　without　losing
your　heart。　　Papa　liked　her　so　muchsee　if　he　does　not　talk　of　her
all　the　evening。　　She　looks　the　picture　of　goodness　and　sweetness。
Only　think　of　her　having　some　of　the　maidenhair　and　cape　jessamine
still　in　water；　that　we　sent　her　so　long　ago。　　She　ahall　have　some
flowers　every　three　days。　　Well；　Dr。　May　said；　'There　is　one　at
least；　that　is　sure　to　be　at　home。'　　She　felt　my　habit；　and　said　I
must　go　and　change　it；　and　she　called　to　a　little　thing　of　six；
telling　her　to　show　me　the　way　to　Flora。　　She　smiled；　and　said　she
wished　she　could　go　herself；　but　Flora　would　take　care　of　me。　　Little
Blanche　came　and　took　hold　of　my　hand；　chattering　away；　up　we　went；
up　two　staircases；　and　at　the　top　of　the　last　stood　a　girl　about
seventeen；　so　pretty！　such　deep　blue　eyes；　and　such　a　complexion！
'That's　Flora；'　little　Blanche　said；　'Flora；　this　is　Miss　Rivers；　and
she's　wet；　and　Margaret　says　you　are　to　take　care　of　her。'〃

〃So　that　was　your　introduction？〃

〃Yes；　we　got　acquainted　in　a　minute。　　She　took　me　into　her　roomsuch
a　room！　　I　believe　Bellairs　would　be　angry　if　she　had　such　a　one；　all
up　in　the　roof；　no　fire；　no　carpet；　except　little　strips　by　the　beds；
there　were　three　beds。　　Flora　used　to　sleep　there　till　Miss　May　was
ill；　and　now　she　dresses　there。　　Yet　I　am　sure　they　are　as　much
ladies　as　I　am。〃

〃You　are　an　only　daughter；　my　dear；　and　a　petted　one；〃　said　Mrs。
Larpent；　smiling。　　〃There　are　too　many　of　them　to　make　much　of；　as　we
do　of　our　Meta。〃

〃I　suppose　so；　but　I　did　not　know　gentlewomen　lived　in　such　a　way；〃
said　Meta。　　〃There　were　nice　things　about；　a　beautiful　inlaid　work…
box　of　Flora's；　and　a　rosewood　desk；　and　plenty　of　books；　and　a　Greek
book　and　dictionary　were　spread　open。　　I　asked　Flora　if　they　were
hers；　and　she　laughed　and　said　no；　and　that　Ethel　would　be　much
discomposed　that　I　had　see　them。　　Ethel　keeps　up　with　her　brother
Normanonly　fancy！　and　he　at　the　head　of　the　school。　　How　clever　she
must　be！〃

〃But；　my　dear；　were　you　standing　in　your　wet　things　all　this　time！〃

〃No；　I　was　trying　on　their　frocks；　but　they　trailed　on　the　ground
upon　me；　so　she　asked　if　I　would　come　and　sit　by　the　nursery　fire
till　my　habit　was　dry；　and　there　was　a　dear　little　good…humoured
baby；　so　fair　and　pretty。　　She　is　not　a　bit　shy；　will　go　to　anybody；
but；　they　say；　she　likes　no　one　so　well　as　her　brother　Norman。〃

〃So　you　had　a　regular　treat　of　baby…nursing。〃

〃That　I　had；　I　could　not　part　with　her；　the　darling。　　Flora　thought
we　might　take　her　down；　and　I　liked　playing　with　her　in　the　drawing…
room　and　talking　to　Miss　May；　till　the　fly　came　to　take　us　home。　　I
wanted　to　have　seen　Ethel；　but；　only　think；　papa　has　asked　Dr。　May　to
bring　Flora　some　day；　how　I　hope　he　will！〃

Little　Meta　having　told　her　story；　and　received　plenty　of　sympathy；
proceeded　to　dress；　and；　while　her　maid　braided　her　hair；　a　musing
fit　fell　upon　her。　　〃I　have　seen　something　of　life　to…day；〃　thought
she。　　〃I　had　thought　of　the　great　difference　between　us　and　the　poor；
but　I　did　not　know　ladies　lived　in　such　different　ways。　　I　should　be
very　miserable　without　Bellairs；　or　without　a　fire　in　my　room。　　I
don't　know　what　I　should　do　if　I　had　to　live　in　that　cold；　shabby
den；　and　do　my　own　hair；　yet　they　think　nothing　of　it；　and　they　are
cultivated　and　ladylike！　　Is　it　all　fancy；　and　being　brought　up　to
it？　　I　wonder　if　it　is　right？　　Yet　dear　papa　likes　me　to　have　these
things；　and　can　afford　them。　　I　never　knew　I　was　luxurious　before；
and　yet　I　think　I　must　be！　　One　thing　I　do　wish；　and　that　is；　that　I
was　of　as　much　use　as　those　girls。　I　ought　to　be。　　I　am　a　motherless
girl　like　them；　and　I　ought　to　be　everything　to　papa；　just　as　Miss
May　is；　even　lying　on　the　sofa　there；　and　only　two　years　older　than　I
am。　　I　don't　think　I　am　of　any　use　at　all；　he　is　fond　of　me；　of
course；　dear　papa；　and　if　I　died；　I　don't　know　what　would　become　of
him；　but　that's　only　because　I　am　his　daughterhe　has　only　George
besides　to　care　for。　　But；　really　and　truly；　he　would　get　on　as　well
without　me。　　I　never　do　anything　for　him；　but　now　and　then　playing　to
him　in　the　evening；　and　that　not　always；　I　am　afraid；　when　I　want　to
be　about　anything　else。　　He　is　always　petting　me；　and　giving　me　all　I
want；　but　I　never　do　anything　but　my　lessons；　and　going　to　the
school；　and　the　poor　people；　and　that　is　all　pleasure。　　I　have　so
much　that　I　never　miss　what　I　give　away。　　I　wonder　whether　it　is　all
right！　　Leonora　and　Agatha　have　not　so　much　money　to　do　as　they
please　withthey　are　not　so　idolised。　　George　said；　when　he　was
angry；　that　papa　idolises　me；　but　they　have　all　these　comforts　and
luxuries；　and　never　think　of　anything　but　doing　what　they　like。　　They
never　made　me　consider　as　these　Mays　do。　　I　should　like　to　know　them
more。　　I　do　so　much　want　a　friend　of　my　own　age。　　It　is　the　only　want
I　have。　　I　have　tried　to　make　a　friend　of　Leonora；　but　I　cannot；　she
never　cares　for　what　I　do。　　If　she　saw　these　Mays　she　would　look　down
on　them。　　Dear　Mrs。　Larpent　is　better　than　any　one；　but　then　she　is
so　much　older。　　Flora　May　shall　be　my　friend。　　I'll　make　her　call　me
Meta　as　soon　as　she　comes。　　When　will　it　be？　　The　day　after
tomorrow？〃

But　little　Meta　watched　in　vain。　　Dr。　May　always　came　with　either
Richard　or　the　groom；　to　drive　him；　and　if　Meta　met　him　and　hoped　he
would　bring　Flora　next　time；　he　only　answered　that　Flora　would　like
it　very　much；　and　he　hoped　soon　to　do　so。

The　truth　was；　it　was　no　such　everyday　matter　as　Meta　imagined。　　The
larger　carriage　had　been　broken；　and　the　only　vehicle　held　only　the
doctorhis　charioteerand　in　a　very　minute　appendage　behind；　a
small　son　of　the　gardener；　to　open　gates；　and　hold　the　horse。

The　proposal　had　been　one　of　those　general　invitations　to　be
fulfilled　at　any　time；　and　therefore　easily　set　aside；　and　Dr。　May；
though　continually　thinking　he　should　like　to　take　his　girls　to
Abbotstoke；　never　saw　the　definite　time　for　so　doing；　and　Flora
herself；　though　charmed　with　Miss　Rivers；　and　delighted　with　the
prospect　of　visiting　her；　only　viewed　it　as　a　distant　prospect。

There　was　plenty　of　immediate　interest　to　occupy　them　at　home；　to　say
nothing　of　the　increasing　employment　that　Cocksmoor　gave　to　thoughts；
legs；　and　needles。　　There　was　the　commencement　of　the　half…year；　when
Tom's　schoolboy　life　was　to　begin；　and　when　it　would　be　proved
whether　Norman　were　able　to　retain　his　elevation。

Margaret　had　much　anxiety　respecting　the　little　boy　about　to　be　sent
into　a　scene　of　temptation。　　Her　great　confidence　was　in　Richard；　who
told　her　that　boys　did　many　more　wrong　things　than　were　known　at
home；　and　yet　turned　out　very　well；　and　that　Tom　would　be　sure　to
right　himself　in　the　end。　　Richard　had　been　blameless　in　his　whole
school　course；　but　though　never　partaking　of　the　other　boys'　evil
practices；　he　could　not　form　an　independent　estimate　of　character；
and　his　tone　had　been　a　little　hurt；　by　sharing　the　school　public
opinion　of　morality。　　He　thought　Stoneborough　and　its　temptations
inevitable；　and　only　wished　to　make　the　best　of　it。　　Margaret　was
afraid　to　harass　her　father　by　laying　the　case　before　him。　　All　her
brothers　had　gone　safely　through　the　school；　and　it　never　occurred　to
her　that　it　was　possible　that；　if　her　father　knew　the　bias　of　Tom's
disposition；　he　might　choose；　for　the　present；　at　least；　some　other
mode　of　education。

She　talked　earnestly　to　Tom；　and　he　listened　impatiently。　　There　is
an　age　when　boys　rebel　against　female　rule；　and　are　not　yet　softened
by　the　chivalry　of　manhood；　and　Tom　was　at　this　time　of　life。　　He　did
not　like　to　be　lectured　by　a　sister；　secretly　disputed　her　right；
and；　proud　of　becoming　a　schoolboy；　had　not　the　generous　deference
for　her　weakness　felt　by　his　elder　brothers；　he　was　all　the　time
peeling　a　stick；　as　if　to　show　that　he　was　not　attending；　and　he
raised　up　his　shoulder　pettishly　whenever　she　came　to　a　mention　of
the　religious　duty　of　sincerity。　　She　did　not　long　continue　her
advice；　and；　much　disappointed　and　concerned；　tried　to　console
herself　with　hoping　that　he　might　have　heeded　more　than　he　seemed　to
do。

He